


Always Love

by bugiiwonderland



Series: Stethoscopes and Heartbeats [1]
Category: NU'EST
Genre: Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Fluff and Humor, M/M, Slow Burn, cursing, mentions of accidents and blood
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-30
Updated: 2018-09-30
Packaged: 2019-07-20 17:26:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 33,956
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16141988
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bugiiwonderland/pseuds/bugiiwonderland
Summary: Minhyun wished they hadn’t moved to Seoul—but it all changed when he stumbled on Jonghyun—covering him in ice cream.





	1. 5. Ice Cream

**Author's Note:**

> Annyeong~ Hi~~ Hello~~~  
> okay I'll stop--HAHAHAHAHA 
> 
> I realized that this is so long (no kidding) and decided that it's better to cut it into chapters bec bro--it's hard to read XD so yeah--it's still the same and just really reaally minor error changes, but anyway enough of that!
> 
> I hope you enjoy and please support #twohyunweek~

**Prologue**

 

_He’s only 11 steps away from Jonghyun._

_11 steps away to tell him that he’s sorry for being an insensitive ass—that he should have known better, that deep inside (really deep inside) that brat exterior—lies a man full of insecurities, of self-doubt—and that he’s only afraid too._

_11 steps away to tell him that everything will work out, that he doesn’t have to be afraid to fail, and that it’s okay to read his mangas._

_11 steps away to assure him that no matter what happens, he’ll be always there for him—even if sometimes he just wants to kill the other for being such a brat and a pain in the ass, but it’s all good—because he’s worth all that trouble and headache, and after all, he’s his ‘pain in the ass’._

_And lastly,_

_11 steps away to tell him that he loves him,_

_Always have,_

_Always will._

 

**_5\. Ice Cream_ **

 

The first time Minhyun saw him, he was 5.

Minhyun and his family just moved to Seoul and are still in the midst of unpacking.

The 5-year-old him got suffocated of their messy new apartment and asked his parents if he could go outside instead—yes, even the 5-year-old him can’t handle things unorganized, especially when his stubby feet keep on stepping on tapes and scraps of boxes that he knows he already put in the trash for so many times.

His parents allowed him, but not after cooing at him and pinching his cheeks because apparently his unamused face looks so adorable and of course, his bossy of a sister needs to come with him for ’adult supervision’—He rolls his eyes.

Yeah sure adult supervision if a 6-year-old could be called an adult—he doesn’t say it out loud of course, after all he doesn’t want to be hit on the head by his so called ‘adult’ sister.

 

“Always look ahead Minhyunnie, okay?” Sujin says patting his head as she goes to the see-saw

“Yes noona~” he answers cutely because he knows that if he doesn’t, it will just result in a 15 minute lecture of how he should address his sister properly—which he’d rather not have now—he’s already in a sour mood since they moved here in Seoul.

It’s not that he hates Seoul... It’s just that he just wish that they didn’t have to move. Busan was their home and his friends are there—but of course what does a 5-year-old boy like him have a say in that?

”HWANG MINHYU—“ before his sister could even finish her sentence he hears a thud and a plop—he really should have listened to his sister telling him to look ahead when walking and not have this monologues in his brain.

“Ugh! MINHYUN!!! I told you to look at where you’re going!! See what you—” He hears his sister yelling at him but that isn’t his concern right now—right now, his concern is the boy who’s now sitting on the ground with ice cream all over his shirt and an empty cone on his hand—courtesy of him—looking up at him with such beautiful round eyes that feels like... feels like what? His 5-year-old self doesn’t know the word for it yet—he should look for that word in the flash cards that his dad bought for him later he thinks.

Anyway going back to the boy... boy? No—this isn’t a boy, too small for a boy, so baby? No—babies aren’t this big as the flash cards say so... what’s the word for it? tod? Todl? Tolder? No not that… toddler?? Yes, toddler this boy is a toddler. The toddler looks adorable—squishy adorable—like those clay doh his mum bought them 3 months ago—or like Sujin’s favorite corgi doll who’s named Youngmin. Focus Minhyun—focus _—_ like what dad always tells him when he talks too much and ends up not saying the thing that he wants to say in the first place.  

He pays attention to the toddler again who’s now blinking at him way waaaaaay too much—like he can’t believe what he’s seeing.

“ **Hi?** ” He says cutely as possible to not scare squishy-adorable away. The toddler looks at him then stares down on the dirty ground that he’s currently sitting then to his shirt then to his cone then to his shirt again then cone then looks at him _—_ making him feel dizzy.

“ **Mwyyy mwwy** “ squishy-adorable says looking back again at his cone and his shirt and back at his cone and shirt then at him and he can see some wait what’s that called again?? The shiny thing in the eyes? He knows that word wait wait—he hears some sniffing so he quickly looks down again to squishy-adorable who‘s pouting now—his squishy cheeks got more squishier as he—OHNOES!! He knows that HOLYLEGGOS—that’s exactly what he did when Sujin took a large bite of his favorite cake—he tries to reach for the toddler to calm him down—“ **MWY ICE CWEAAAAAAAAAAAAAM** ” but again he’s too late—just like Sujin’s warning a few minutes ago. Squishy-adorable is shrieking and trashing like crazy _—_ just like Minki‘s favorite horrible doll, Chucky _—_ which scares the Godzilla out of him, fortunately squishy-adorable is super cute that he’s not that afraid of him.

...Or not as squishy-adorable’s continuous high-pitched wailing is now starting to scare him and HOLYLEGGOS his noona’s going to kill him for making squishy-adorable cry!! he tries to hold the other again but he can’t because squishy-adorable—as small as he is—is trashing like crazy—like really crazy that you’ll wonder what kind of vitamins his momma is giving him to have such strength!

Anyway back to what’s happening, squishy-adorable is kicking the ground with his small adorable feet, which hits him on the leg every now and then and it’s getting quite painful, but what’s worse is squishy-adorable’s arm-throwing? Arm-swaying? Back and forth—that keeps reminding him of that giant weird human-like balloon at the rest stop on their way here.

He tries his best (even with a hundred thoughts that’s running in his busy mind) to make squishy-adorable stop crying—so he goes closer to the other as his arm-throwing started to slow down. Squishy-adorable seems to have finally push his limits as he puts down his arms on his sides—an opening for him to get closer and to what? What do you do to make someone feel better? His 5–year-old brain starts to come up with ideas—oh!! That! He does what he’s sister does to him (when someone teases him how big his head is) and pats the boy in the head—little did he know squishy-adorable was just recharging himself for another round of arm-swaying-feet-kicking, which his fox-like eyes didn’t notice as squishy-adorable started raising his arms and begins thrashing again hitting him square in the face—that his cheeks feel hot and his eyes started to get teary that he begins to feel…” **SUJIN NOOOOOOOOOOONAA** ” he starts crying, as he plops on the dirty ground joining the other who’s still wailing about his ice cream.

 

“ **Aigoo, it’s okay Minhyunnie... noona’s here, don’t cry... shhh don’t cry...** ” Sujin says as she pats his back comforting him.

“ **It’s okay Jonghyunnie... Noona’s gonna buy you another one... so stop crying now… there there...** ” Kahi says hugging his little brother

 The two girls look and smile at each other

No words needed to be said,

Because somehow they know that this will be the beginning of a beautiful friendship.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ***MILK TEA TIME*** (I missed typing that lol )  
> firstly~~ I just want to thank the people behind #twohyunweek (really you guys are amazing!!!)  
> can we do this again??? please please please :D
> 
> and to my fellow creators/writers you worked hard!!! we all worked hard!!! really!!! let's do a virtual bear hug!!!*hugs*
> 
> and to everyone who's here reading, and supporting, and sharing, and liking and just everything~~ and not just here in AO3 but in tw land too--really thank you guys for supporting us!!! You don't know how it feels to see works/creations getting liked, rt'd, qrt'd, kudos, hits, comments, and everything else--it's just feels like so heartwarming and ugh--I'm just so proud of everyone and happy to be part of this <3333 (#feels)
> 
> and to those who read this long and messy story,  
> Thank you so much~ kamsamnida~~ salamat po~~  
> I hope you had fun reading this~~ (it was a roller-coaster ride for me XD )  
> and please leave comments (if you can) and also support the other creators too~  
> and that's all~ Thank you for the love and support!! (I just wanna say that XD) and happy #TwoHyunWeek everyone~


	2. 14. Like vs Like

_Fourteen_.

He was fourteen when he learned what a _crush_ is.

The girls in their class keep talking about _“crush”_ during their free period and curiosity got the best of him, so he decides to ask Aron as they walk towards the field for their shared P.E. class.

“Hyung, what’s a ‘ _crush_ ’?”

“And here I thought you know _everything_ Minhyunnie.” Aron says with a smirk

“I can’t know everything, I’m only 14 after all.” He replies with a shrug

“I’ve known what _‘crush’_ is since I was _7_.” Aron teasingly says “but to answer your question, _a ‘crush’ is when you like someone._ ”

 He nods as he ponders what Aron just said. So a _crush_ is when you _like_ someone… hmm… he _likes_ everyone in their class… he _likes_ all their teachers except teacher Han… so he doesn’t have a _crush_ on him then? Oh… he _likes_ the ahjussi who sells his favorite ice cream in front of their school, and the ahjummas who makes them delicious lunch every day and of course his family and Jonghyun and Jonghyun’s family, and his friend Minki in Busan who he misses from time to time (read: when Jonghyun’s family goes to Gangneung)

“So does that mean I have a _crush_ on everyone except teacher Han?” His question must have taken Aron by surprise because he almost fell on the stairs if not for his quick reflexes of pulling him back

“I almost died because of you!!” Aron says clutching his chest

“I actually saved you from falling though?”

“Yeah, but you’re also the cause of it?”

“But I just asked a question?”

“Yeah and that question was the _most ridiculous_ one that I’ve heard in my _15 years of existence_.” Aron says rolling his eyes at him as they begin to walk again, this time Aron’s holding on the railings (lol)

“Is it really ridiculous that I don’t have a crush on teacher Han?”

“No Minhyun, it’s ridiculous that you have a crush on everyone.”

“What do you mean?”

“I told you that _‘crush’_ means _liking someone_ right?”

“Yeah?”

“Does it makes sense that you have a _crush_ on everyone? Well not everyone since you don’t have a crush on teacher Han.” Aron says shaking his head as he laughs at him

“But I _like_ everyone?” Aron looks at him like he’s the dumbest person in the whole school “Seriously Minhyun? I always thought you’re the _smartest_ in your grade, but I guess I was wrong. Have you always been this _obtuse??_ ” The other says mocking him

“Like I said just because I’m the _smartest_ in our grade, doesn’t mean I know _everything_ hyung.” he answers impassively. It’s not like he knows everything and that’s why he was asking anyway—to know.

“Yeah, but something like this is so simple that I don’t even know why you can’t understand the difference between the two. It’s not like it’s hard to understand…” Aron says with a shrug. He then taps his finger on his lips—a habit of his when he’s thinking about something.

“Anyway, since you don’t seem to get it—let this amazing hyung of yours explain it to you, so you better listen carefully kiddo.” He rolls his eyes “Sure hyung.”

“...A crush is when you like someone—”

“You already—” Aron glares at him “No interruptions!!!!” he snorts and nods for the older boy to continue “As I was saying a crush is when you like someone—a certain someone in fact.”

“So a crush is liking only one? Then let me choose—”

“Minhyun _no_ —not in that whatever way you’re thinking, okay?” he nods “So let’s say for example…” Aron stops walking and looks at the field then suddenly looks at him beaming “Okay, look at the field and tell me what you see.”

“The grass? The goal posts? The bleachers? And everyone?” He says confused at Aron’s question. Aron rolls his eyes and shakes his head disapprovingly. “Of course, of course that’s what you’ll see—stupid me for asking such an obvious question…” Aron says mumbling as if he can’t hear him. “Okay, minus the grass, goal posts and the bleachers, I want you to just focus on everyone, okay?”  He nods looking at them. “Now I want you to look at them one by one and just listen to me okay?”

“One by one?” He asks confused again on what Aron wants him to see

“Yes look at them one by one, now don’t interrupt me and just listen okay?” He nods “You said that you like everyone, and now you’re looking at them one by one right?” He nods again “Now, I want you to pick the ones that you like more than the others, you don’t have to say it out loud, just inside your big head, okay?”

He nods again as he starts picking the ones he like more than the others. There’s _Seongwu, Niel, Cheol, Shua, Jeonghan, Nayoung, Roa and—_ Oh his sister _Sujin_ —well he likes her more than the others even if she’s scary (and irritating) as hell most of the times…okay just add her in the list then…

And there’s _Jonghyun_ … _Kim Jonghyun._

Memories of their first meeting flashes back in his mind—how he bumped into _Jonghyun,_ making him cry because his ice cream is all over his shirt and cannot be eaten anymore—yes _Jonghyun_ cried because of the _ice cream_ and not the fact that he’s covered with a melting ice cream that’s probably getting _stickier_ by the minute as it clings to his shirt and chest and how he thought of him as a _toddler_ (and a _squid_ ) when the _other_ is actually a few months older than him.

~•~

_“…now that it seems that the two of you finally calmed down, how about we get some ice cream? What do you say kiddo?” Sujin beams as she asks the toddler next to him_

_“Noona, he’s not a kid, he’s a toddler.” He says in between sniffs_

_“I’wm not a towdler!!!” Squishy-adorable says with a pout and a stomp which makes their sisters laugh._

_“Don’t tell me you’re still a baby? Because babies aren’t as big as you!” He says_

_“No No!!! Jonghyunnie ishn’t a bwaby!!! I’wm a kwid!!!”_

_“A squid??? Aren’t you human? Like us?”_

_“Ughhhh!!! A kwid!!!!!!! Jonghyunnie is a kwid!!!!!!!!! Not a qweed!!! But a kwid!!!!!”_

_“You’re what????” he asks not fully understanding the other’s language_

_“A KWIIIIIIIIIIIIIIDDDDDDD!!!!!!” Squishy-adorable says yelling at him which makes him hide behind his noona. Squishy-adorable has a lot of fire power hiding beneath that little body of his (seriously, what do they feed him with?)._

_“Now now, calm down Jonghyun, what did momma say about yelling? Is it good or bad?”_

_Jonghyun—so his name is Jonghyun… what a beautiful name he thinks. He takes a peek at Jonghyun who’s eyeing him with his laser beam eyes (maybe he's not really human?) as he pouts at him (again)_

_“Kim Jonghyun.” Jonghyun sister says in her noona voice just like how Sujin does with him—guess all sisters are the same—beneath the pretty face is a scary girl—he shudders at the thought._ _Jonghyun then looks at his sister and somehow switches off his fire power as he begins to calm down and look like an angel._

_“Ish bad… I pwomise not tyu yell agwain noona, Jonghyunnie ish sowwy...” Jonghyun says hugging his sister like a baby panda which is the cutest thing that he saw in his 5 years of life. Jonghyun’s noona chuckles at his brother hugging him in return (maybe she’s not as scary as Sujin?)._

_“Very good Jonghyunnie, now how about we introduce ourselves to our new friends?” the other says winking at them._

_“Owkiesh~~”Jonghyun says as he looks at them with a smile that so sweet like cotton candy… he can’t help but to look at him and only look at him… Jonghyun…has this…like going to the end of the rainbow and finding out that there’s a cauldron of gold-covered-chocolate-coins and candies feeling?_

_“Minhyunnie? Are you listening? I’m sorry, my brother’s always has a lot of thoughts in his mind that he’s always…” His sister says as they start walking towards the ice cream parlor. “It’s okay.” The other says smiling “I think it’s normal for their age? Our Jonghyunnie is like that too—but says it aloud instead and aside from him being too energetic and his tantrums every now and then—thanked barbies that he’s so adorable or else…” He hears Jonghyun’s sister say as they continue to walk._

_He didn’t even notice that they began walking (as always) good thing he didn’t bump into someone again and what’s Jonghyun’s sister’s name? He must’ve not heard it as he was…_

_"Hwey~~” he can feel someone tugging on his shirt. He looks at his side to see a bubbly Jonghyun (how many sides does this toddler—oh right he’s a squid—have in him?) he can’t help but be mesmerized by the squid’s round dark brown eyes which reminds him of the stars at night that’s looking straight at him—his eyes turned crescents just like the moon as the squid smiles at him._

_“Hi?” he says smiling at him too._

_“Whatchs youw neym?” Jonghyun asked him his name right? It’s hard to understand squid language. “Minhyun.” He replies._

_Jonghyun smiles and looks at him—bending his body as if to get a better view of him upside down that he can’t help but laugh at the squid’s adorable weird action._

_“Mwinhyun? Youw neym ish too wong~~I’wl jusht cawl you Mwinnie!”  His name is too long??? But Jonghyun’s name is longer?? He feels warm fingers hold his hand and looks at the still beaming Jonghyun—wow? The squid is fast and quite touchy?_

_“Mwinnie~~ Mwinnie~~” Jonghyun says, singing his name as he sways their hands in the air. ...But...Mwinnie? “Mwinnie? Like the cartoon character??”_

_“Yesh~~Mwinnie mwouse!!” Jonghyun exclaims._ _The squid lets go of his hand and started clapping and running in circles around him—making him feel dizzy (again). This squid just doesn’t seem to run out of energy and try as he might he can’t keep up with him._

_But Minnie Mouse is a girl… and he’s gonna call him Mwinnie? No, Mwinnie is for girls and he’s not a girl. He sighs._

_“Whatch’s the mwatter Mwinnie?” Jonghyun must’ve heard him sigh that he stops his running and looks at him holding his hand again, his adorable brows knitting in confusion and worry?_

_He doesn’t want to worry the squid so he decides to tell him the truth_ _“…I don’t want to be called Mwinnie.” He mumbles_

_“Why??” Jonghyun asks him—this time his adorable brows are raised—which is just so cute and adorable and—FOCUS MINHYUN!!_

_“Because… I’m a boy.” He answers looking straight at him_

_The other looks confused again “Sow?”_

_“Mwinnie…that’s… that’s for girls…” he says feeling embarrassed that he looks away from Jonghyun and looks at their sisters’ back (who’s busy talking and seemed to forget about their ‘nanny’ duties) instead._

_Jonghyun tugs his hand to get him to look at him… he looks at his side and sees Jonghyun’s beautiful eyes, lips curved upward beaming at him. He can feel his cheeks grow hotter and not the same as earlier when Jonghyun accidentally slapped him (hard) in the face._

_“How abwout Mwin then?” Jonghyun asks him and he nods “Gwood~~ I’m Jonghyunnie! Letch’s bwe fwiends from nwow on Mwinnie!!”_

_“Not Mwinnie!!!”_

_“Woopsies!!” The other says giggling_

~•~

 

“Earth to Minhyun? Hello??? Are you there???” Aron says waving his hand at his face.

“Yes, I’m still here.” he says absentmindedly—looking at Jonghyun and their friends who are now busy doing warm ups.

“Glad that you’re back kid! Are you done choosing?” he nods “Okay, now among those—wait if you choose your sister, remove her on the list.”

“Why?? I even had a hard time putting her there!”

“Just do it.”

“Fine.”

 

“Okay, among those, choose the ones that you think you would hang-out with during vacation.”

“Just during vacation? How about on weekends?”

“Please just do what I say.”

He chooses Seongwu, Niel, Cheol, Shua, Jeonghan and…

“Hyung what if I just don’t want to hang-out with them during vacation?”

“What do you mean?”

“Like… I want to be with them like...everyday?”

“Then that makes this a whole lot easier!” Aron says triumphantly _—_ pumping his fist in the air _—_ like he won an award “Are you done?” He nods again “Okay this time, I want you to listen carefully—really carefully and think of the _first person_ that comes to your mind, okay?” he nods

 

**_“Think of the person who makes you happy on a bad day, the one who makes you smile when you feel like crying.”_ **

 

_He’s staring at the test paper in his hands—he still couldn’t believe that he got a failing mark—a first. Of course he knows that he isn’t good at that subject and he did his best to make up for it by studying—but a failing mark? Shit._

_He groans and leans his head on the desk, closing his eyes as if that will make the red **F** disappear. He can feel someone nudging him so he faces sideways and opens his eyes._

_“Here.” Jonghyun says handing him his favorite cup of ice cream. He looks at the other bewildered on how he got the ice cream since they don’t have that in the cafeteria unless...he couldn’t possibly went over the wall (again) just to get him this…right?_

_“Just eat it Min, and stop feeling bad about your grade, it’s just a quiz, you can always do better next time.”  Jonghyun says nonchalantly—looking cool as always._

_“Easy for you to say when you’re so good at math.” He answers with a scoff._

_“The only thing I’m good at—while you, on the hand is good at everything—well besides, math.” Jonghyun answers sarcastically as leans on his chair and looks out at the field._

_He can’t help but look at Jonghyun—somehow touched of his best friend’s actions but his best friend suddenly looks so distant? And somewhat...empty? Why? Is something wrong?_

_Jonghyun then looks at him and smiles… but not his signature ‘eye-crinkle-I-know-I’m-handsome-smile… which is weird..._

_“Eat it Minhyun—I didn’t jump over the wall just so you could stare at me the whole day—come to think of it, weren’t you staring at me during the test? Is that why you failed? Because you can’t stop looking at my beautiful face?” Jonghyun coyly tells him—waggling his brows._

_He removes the lid of cup and throws it at the other. Jonghyun laughs and even winks at him—He really should stop hanging out with OngNiel especially Ong. The things that he’s learning from that guy. He shakes his head remembering how he was so worried on Jonghyun earlier when the other is just his usual self—which is his little bratty shit self._

_“Stop daydreaming about me Minhyun.” Jonghyun says flicking him on the forehead_

_“YA!!!! That hurts!!” Jonghyun snickers—a little too proud of himself (as always) and steals a bite from his ice cream—which he got used to by now._

 

**_“The one whose smile makes you feel like you came first place on the regionals Quiz bee.”_ **

 

_“Min!!! I got him out!!!!!! I finally got him out!!!!!!!!!!!!!!” Jonghyun says waving the huge Squirtle plushie in his face—he pushes the dirty toy away from him making it fall on the ground._

_“Ugh! You don’t have to do that!” Jonghyun says quickly taking his precious Squirtle from the ground, dusting it as if it’s not dirty from being stuck in the claw machine for months—yes months, because ever since Jonghyun saw that Squirtle, 5 months ago—he had to accompany him an hour every day—rain or shine—to get that dirty Squirtle out of its “prison” as his best friend says._

_“Let’s go eat now.” He says pulling the other who’s still busy dusting his precious toy—he’s starving. The last meal they had was lunch (courtesy of Jonghyun’s mum) and after spending the whole afternoon rescuing Squirtle because Jonghyun was so adamant that he can get him out today (which turned out to be true) he’s excited that they can finally eat and have their usual Saturday street food mukbang._ _He glances at Jonghyun, still busy with his toy and he can’t help but shake his head as he sees his best friend holding up the plushie like how a parent would hold his baby—looking at it with so much adoration like it‘s his child._

_“Are you that happy that you finally rescued your twin brother Jjuya?” He asks teasingly._

_He knows that Jonghyun would probably hit him for calling with the nickname that he hates so much—but he can’t help it—he just loves teasing his best friend._ _Jonghyun looks at him, and he can’t help but put his arms in a protective way—getting ready for the outburst of the other—but none came and he just hears Jonghyun chuckling at him, so he relaxes his stance, looks at his best friend, who’s beaming at him with so much happiness that he feels mesmerized by just looking at the other smiling…_

_Just like the beautiful Pink Skies in front of them…_

_That makes him feel as if he’s being pulled towards him…_

_His heart starts beating loudly._

_“Yes, Minnie, I’m happy.” Jonghyun says looking back again to his Squirtle._

 

**_“…How her beautiful fox-like eyes remind you of the stars that you see at night, how her laugh is all you want to hear all day and how addicting it is like the coffee that mum only allows you to have when you have to stay up all night to study…”_ **

 

_“Good evening momma!!! Your other son is...” he says opening the door hoping to surprise Jonghyun’s mum only to be surprised by Jonghyun’s noona who’s looking at him with so much amusement “…here.” He says finishing his sentence and feeling embarrassed._

_“Well…I’m glad that you’re here ‘my other brother’” Kahi says smirking at him. “But ‘momma’ still doing some grocery shopping with ‘papa’ at the moment, they should be back at 4 though.” He nods too embarrassed to answer the other “Also she told me to tell you guys not to do your weekly street food date—” date?? What does that even mean? “—Jonghyun is upstairs, if you want to see him, that is.” The other says teasing him._

_He wishes that the ground would open up and swallow him. It’s not like he isn’t close with Jonghyun’s sister, he is—but she’s too much alike like Sujin that even if the other is nice and sweet just like his sister, he can’t help but be wary of her especially when he grew up seeing her ‘discipline’ Jonghyun when the other switches to his ‘little shit mode’ just like what his very own noona does to him from time to time (read: everyday)_

_“Ah…yes noona…I’ll go upstairs now…”_

_“Sure lil brother. Oh, is Sujin back from the academy?” Kahi asks him_

_“Yes noona, she’s helping mum to prepare for tonight’s dinner.” Kahi then switches off the TV and gets up. “I’ll go and help them then. Also, please tell our dear brother to clean up before our parents get home.” He nods as he goes upstairs._

_He can hear gunshots coming from Jonghyun’s room—his best friend probably played the whole morning til now (again) forgetting to shower._

  _He looks at his watch and it’s already 3:15, he has 45 minutes to pull Jonghyun away from his game. Which means 10 minutes of him trying to get the other’s attention, 15 minutes of Jonghyun telling him to ‘give me just 2 minutes’, another 13 minutes to pull the whining Jonghyun out of the bed (because he switched off the console), 2 minutes to get him to go the bathroom, and lastly 5 minutes for him to shower (yes Jonghyun only takes 5 minutes to shower which he doesn’t even know how the guy does that and just imagining it gives him nightmares) He sighs. It’s his fault—He should’ve stopped his parents for getting Jonghyun this new game for his birthday last month and now he has to deal with a smelly (not really) and oily (Yes definitely) Kim Jonghyun._

_“Ya, Kim Jonghyun, Kahi noona said to—WOW.” He says aghast at the state of his best friend’s room. He thought that when Kahi told him to tell the other to clean up—it means that he should take his 5-minute-shower—not this._

_The room is a mess—no a wreck—his room is a wreck—like a storm passed by it and turned everything in shambles. Books, notebooks and pens on the floor and the bed, candy wrappers are everywhere, bags of chips and chips on the floor (which the ants are feasting on at the moment—Yay)._

_The last time he went to Jonghyun’s room was just yesterday morning—to wake the boy up which ended up him cleaning and putting everything in their rightful places as he waits for his very messy best friend. It’s only been a day and—he sighs._ _He looks at the messy floor again and sees Optimus Bugi (Yes that’s his name) drinking something. He quickly goes to the tortoise to rescue him from drinking cola—hoping that Optimus Bugi didn’t drink some._

_He eyes his best friend and nudges him with his foot, the other just grunts acknowledging his presence. He nudges him again harder this time and like earlier (as usual) the other just grunts._

_"KIM JONGHYUN.” He says with force. Jonghyun sighs and pauses his game, knowing that he’s in for some nagging._

_Jonghyun slowly turns to face him, putting on his innocent smile that everyone falls for (including him)—as if that would save him from his nagging._

_Jonghyun starts batting his innocent-pure eyes at him like a puppy and he just wants to—no, keep your head up Minhyun, don’t fall for it, don’t let that angelic but devilish boy get to you—you’re better than that, well not better—just don’t give in._

_You have to force authority like how Sujin and Kahi does when you and your little devil friend goes overboard—yes, remember that time when Jonghyun said you guys should ditch school only to get caught by your sisters’ at the computer shop playing games that you were both grounded for a week—and how you ended up being grounded again for sneaking out on the last night because the little manipulative devil showed you some shit he wrote on his sketchpad through the window (yes, very Taylor Swift—I know) that says **‘I miss your cuddles Mwinnie, please sneak out and sleep with me’** and the stupid boy you are gave in._

_He shakes his head remembering that night and even if he goes back to that time he’ll still probably do the same because who wouldn’t give in to that? (Probably everyone aside from him)._

_He sees Jonghyun grinning at him probably knowing that his little ‘innocent game’ is working. He looks at Optimus Bugi and meets the tortoise’s small beady eyes giving him the strength not to give in to the other this time._

_“Mwinnieeeeee~” Jonghyun says, cooing at him in his angelic-cutesy-voice._

_He looks at Optimus Bugi again and he can feel the tortoise nod at him that he can do this. He puts up his walls and braces himself. You can do this Hwang Minhyun. Optimus Bugi believes in you. Don’t let the tortoise down._

_He looks at Jonghyun, making sure that the other’s looking at him, establishing eye contact, Hwang Sujin style._

_“Don’t you ‘Mwinnie’ me Jonghyun.” Jonghyun winces surprised that his little trick didn’t work. (Atta boy Hwang Minhyun!! if Optimus Bugi has longer arms he would probably be applauding his bravery) His best friend pouts at him with that very adorable pout that he just wants to—NO HWANG MINHYUN DON’T GIVE IN—STAND YOUR GROUND._

_He glares at other to tell him that he won’t have it his way this time. Jonghyun deflates and sighs, raising his arms in surrender—accepting his defeat._

_Good. He winks at Optimus Bugi and he knows that the tortoise is proud at him for withstanding the charms of the other._

_“Have you seen the state of your room Kim Jonghyun?”  Jonghyun shakes his head—arms still raised like a kid being punished. “Put your arms down and look.” He says waving to the catastrophic room. Jonghyun does what he says and looks around his lips forming a big adorable ‘O’ as he realizes the mess that he created._

_“I just cleaned this yesterday Jonghyun, and I even reminded you so many times to put everything back in order when you’re done with it, put your trash in the bin—but look!!!” he says pointing at the wrappers and the bottle of cola on the floor “Optimus Bugi almost drunk cola!!! If it weren’t for me he’ll be dead by now!”_

_“Our Optimus Bugi, Is he okay?????” Jonghyun stands and rushes to take the tortoise from his hands checking if the other’s alive._

_Wait. Did he hear it right? ‘Our Optimus Bugi’? ‘OUR OPTIMUS BUGI’??? Like his and Jonghyun’s Optimus Bugi???? That’s what ‘Our’ means right????_

_“Optimus Bugi-yah~~papa’s sorry~~” he hears the other cooing at ‘their’ Optimus Bugi_ _“But your dada’s home now~~”_ _Three words kept echoing in his mind ‘ **Our’** , ‘ **Dadda’** , and **‘Home’**_

_“And he’s gonna clean our place so you’ll be safe again~~” the other says in a sing-song voice—O_ _h make that four **‘Clean’** —that woke him from whatever thoughts he’s having towards his best friend. _ _“Excuse me? Me? Cleaning this disastrous place?!” He asks shocked—because no—hell no he won’t clean this disastrous place up._

  _“Of course~~ you wouldn’t want our son to be living in this ‘disastrous’ place, right Minhyunnie?” Jonghyun says batting his innocent-round-beautiful-eyes at him (again)._ _He can feel his heart started that weird strong and loud beat (again) just like that time when they rescued Squirtle. Is he sick or something?_

  _“Min? Are you okay?” Jonghyun says shaking his arm and he nods—a bit too much. Jonghyun then laughs at him. His addicting ‘he.he.he.het’ that always makes him smile no matter how down he feels._ _“Hold our son, I’ll just get the broom and trash bag downstairs.” Jonghyun says as he passes him ‘their son’ and leaves the room. He can hear the other’s footsteps as he goes down. He sits on the bed—not caring if it’s the clean part or not._

_“I lost again, didn’t I Optimus?” he whispers to ‘their son’._

_Optimus Bugi raises his head and he groans._

_Jonghyun won his little game again. As always._

 

**_“And how you hate Fridays because it means you won’t see her again for 2 days but always so happy and excited on Sundays, because you can finally see her again the next day…”_ **

****

_“We’re going to Gangneung this Monday, Minnie.” Jonghyun says as they eat their sandwich._

_It’s the last day before their summer break. Jonghyun and him have known each other for 3 years now, and they evolved from being ‘friends’ to ‘best of friends’._

_Some things didn’t change though, like how Jonghyun still calls him ‘Minnie’ from time to time—he already gave up long ago on correcting him since he would end up calling him ‘Minnie’ again. At least it’s no longer ‘Mwinnie’ and that the boy finally lost his unnecessary ‘w’s and ‘h’s._

_He’s also used to Jonghyun’s family going to Gangneung once a month, so he’s not sure why the other’s telling him this now since he would be back in 2 days anyway._

_“That’s good.” He says as he wipes the other’s lips that’s full of mayonnaise._

_“It’s not good Minnie…” Jonghyun says with a huff as he looks down on his sandwich._

_“Why?” he asks the other whose mood suddenly turn sad._

_“Momma and papa said we’re gonna stay there for 20 sleeps…” Jonghyun says “and I don’t want to.” the other adds but more like a whisper._

_Jonghyun’s right… It’s not good… and he feels sad that Jonghyun would be gone for a long time… the longest time that they didn’t see each other was 3 sleeps—when their families had to go to their hometown for Chuseok… and he remembers how much he missed his friend that time even when he’s with Minki (which irritated the other because all he talks about is Jonghyun) and their other friends._

_20 sleeps…will he be okay? 20 sleeps without Jonghyun means no one to play games with, no one who would watch and laugh with him watching their favorite cartoons… no one to share his favorite ice cream with… no one to nag to clean his room… No one would tease him how big his head is…no one to… just imagining it makes him feel like crying…_

_He sniffs and hears the boy next to him sniffing too._ _They look at each other—and laugh at one another with their teary eyes._

_Sometimes it feels weird how they feel and think about the same thing as if they’re twins,_

_But I guess that’s normal when you’re best of friends? Like just by looking at each other you already know what the other is feeling, what he wants to do, and say?_

_Jonghyun nudges him, this time his eyes sparkling—and not because of their teary eyes and Minhyun knows that his best friend came up with an idea, and that he’ll surely like it._

_“Do you want to go to Gangneung with us Minnie?” Jonghyun asks him_

_“Definitely Jjuya!” he says hugging the other boy_

 

**_“How when she’s sad and down… you feel the same too, and you would do everything to make her feel happy again…”_ **

 

_He’s been looking for Jonghyun for 30 minutes now, the other suddenly disappeared after the match ended._

_He knows Jonghyun’s probably blaming himself—that it’s because he’s ‘lacking’ (in Jonghyun’s words) as a captain that they lost the match against the other school and can’t join the finals. It’s not even his fault nor anyone—the one they are up against are way too good and has always been known for that—he’s more thankful that the game ended without anyone getting injured because the other team’s brusque body cannot be compared to their lanky ones. So it’s still a relief for him._

_He spots a familiar head at the bench a few meters away from him—shoulders hunched—still blaming himself. He’s not even surprised, because it’s Jonghyun, and that’s exactly how he is. Always blaming himself for something he has no control of._

_He sits next to him and hands him the egg bun that Sujin gave him earlier for “operation cheer Jonghyunnie up”. There are times that he’s thankful to have Sujin as his sister, and it’s one of these, on how she always looks out for Jonghyun (when she wasn’t even told to and need to), especially when Kahi noona left for college._

_“Eat. You haven’t eaten all day Jonghyun.” He says forcing the other to take a bite of the egg bun._

_“I’m not hungry Minhyun.” The other says. He saw that coming._

_“Eat—Sujin noona told me to tell you to eat that or she’ll call—” Jonghyun takes a bite of his egg bun even before he finishes his sentence._

_“Very good Jjuya~~” he says patting his head earning a deathly glare from the other._

_He chuckles. “It’s not your fault that we lost the match Jonghyun.” He says and Jonghyun sighs next to him. “You have to do what you have to do as our captain, and yes it sucks that we lost, but if you didn’t keep switching players, one of us would probably be tired to keep up and be alert by the second half which would probably result in one of us being injured—I mean c'mon! You’ve seen how big their bodies are, you should be thankful that all of us survived unscathed when they keep tackling us—even OngNiel had a hard time against them and ended up looking like ghosts—and they’re our key players. So stop sulking okay? It’s not your fault nor anyone’s.”_

_“…but-” he clicks his tongue as he crosses his arms on his chest and pouts at Jonghyun—just like how he always does when he doesn’t get his way._ _Jonghyun laughs “Do I really do it like that?” Jonghyun asks, his eyes crinkling now and a smile on his face—which means he’s done blaming himself. Good, it worked._

 " _Yes—and remember how you would always wail when you don’t get what you want? You were such a brat that me and our noona’s had a hard time—”_

_“Well—atleast I’m not the one who thought a kid is a squid for half a year.” The other says finishing the last of his egg bun_

_“Hey!!!! You can’t blame me for that! I can’t even understand half of what you’re saying because of your ‘squid’ language!”_

_“Whatever floats your boat ‘Mwinnie’. I can’t believe you gave in and let me call you that for whole year—admit it, you actually liked it when I called you ‘Mwinnie’ back then, didn’t you?” Jonghyun says doing that weird-eyebrow-wagging as he teases him._

_“Yeah sure, I like it so much. Just like how you blushed that day when I called you ‘Jjuya’ for the first time.” He says giving him his bag._

  _“How can I not blush when you suddenly hugged me and called me that?” the other says as he stands up_

_“Well~ who was the one who was crying that time as soon as he saw me go out of the car when we went to Busan for Chuseok?” Jonghyun hits him on the shoulders which makes him laugh harder because he knows that he won this teasing match._

_“You can’t use that. You know that my kid self just missed you so much that time.”_

_“Sure Jjuya~ whatever floats your boat.” He sees Jonghyun rolling his eyes at him. “Let’s go Jju, we have someplace to be.” He says pulling the other’s hand to make him walk faster._

_“Where are we going Min?” Jonghyun asks confused_

_“You’ll see.” He says with a wink._

**_“…and every time you look at her, you just want to protect her… make her happy… and give her the world…”_ **

 

_“Holy—Minhyun, what how?” He chuckles at Jonghyun’s dazzled face—too astonish that he can’t even form a sentence. Jonghyun’s lips forming an “O” (as always when he’s surprised) just looking around like he’s in paradise—well Jonghyun’s actually in paradise—he’s own paradise._

_“Go and look around and pick one book—just one okay?” he says reminding him and making sure he understands._

_“Yes yes, look around, pick one book, just one” Jonghyun mumbles repeating it like a mantra. He pushes his best friend to one of the book shelves knowing that if he doesn’t the other would probably just stay standing in his place ogling at the mangas around him._

_“I’ll just be at the novel section there, if you need me okay?” he says pointing where he’s going to. “Yes yes” Jonghyun says not even looking at him but staring at the collection of mangas in front of him._

_I guess working here last weekend with all the dust and dirt that he has to endure while Jonghyun’s at Gangneung was worth it. Yup definitely worth it as he takes a peek at his best friend whose busy ooh-ing and mumbling “manga manga manga” every now and then like a parrot._

_He smiles and just hopes that they’ll be able to go home before nightfall._

_And that he doesn’t have to stop a crying Jonghyun on choosing just one manga._

 

**“Hwang Minhyun!!!!! HWAAAANG MINHYUNNN!!!!!”** Jonghyun’s yelling at him—disrupting his thoughts as _always_.

He looks at Aron’s who looking at his sister across the field. So Aron likes his sister huh? He can’t help but shake his head.

_“Goodluck hyung.”_ he says patting him on the back. Because Aron needs it, it’s his sister that he’s crushing on after all and just like him and Jonghyun, they’re best friends too. He doesn’t know how Aron was able to put up with his sister (Sujin’s great and everything but her personality is too strong that most boys are scared of her) and now after listening to Aron, he can finally understand and somehow relate to it.

After all, he knows what a ‘crush’ is now and the difference between what he thought _‘liking’_ means to _‘liking someone’_ really means.

He starts walking to the field,

Walking towards him.

The other looking at him disapprovingly for being late in their class.

“What took you so long bighead?” Jonghyun asks him arms crossed in his chest

_Yeah…that’s what I want to ask myself too, Jonghyun. What took me so long to know that I’ve like you all along?_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ***MILK TEA TIME*** (I missed typing that lol )  
> firstly~~ I just want to thank the people behind #twohyunweek (really you guys are amazing!!!)  
> can we do this again??? please please please :D
> 
> and to my fellow creators/writers you worked hard!!! we all worked hard!!! really!!! let's do a virtual bear hug!!!*hugs*
> 
> and to everyone who's here reading, and supporting, and sharing, and liking and just everything~~ and not just here in AO3 but in tw land too--really thank you guys for supporting us!!! You don't know how it feels to see works/creations getting liked, rt'd, qrt'd, kudos, hits, comments, and everything else--it's just feels like so heartwarming and ugh--I'm just so proud of everyone and happy to be part of this <3333 (#feels)
> 
> and to those who read this long and messy story,  
> Thank you so much~ kamsamnida~~ salamat po~~  
> I hope you had fun reading this~~ (it was a roller-coaster ride for me XD )  
> and please leave comments (if you can) and also support the other creators too~  
> and that's all~ Thank you for the love and support!! (I just wanna say that XD) and happy #TwoHyunWeek everyone~


	3. 16. Kang Dongho

_KANG DONGHO._

He hates hearing the name _Kang Dongho._

He hasn’t even met the guy formally but he’s annoyed at him already.

Especially when the girls in their class kept talking about _‘Kang Dongho this_ ’ or _‘Kang Dongho that’_ and just hearing the word _‘Kang’_ irks him that he stops listening to whatever comes after that (which ends up accidentally ignoring Daniel too).

They’re not even in the same class and yet his classmates seem to know everything about the guy which makes him knowledgeable on the very infamous transfer student from Jejudo.

_Kang Dongho also known as ‘Sexy Bandit’ (No shit—they gave him that nickname)_

_The girls fawn over his ‘manly-handsome’ visuals and ‘breath-taking-too-beautiful-brown-eyes’ (his fox-like eyes are beautiful too by the way, according to his parents, Jonghyun’s parents and Jonghyun <333) that once you look at it, you’ll fall for him and there’s no going back (what does that even mean)_, and that all you want to do is stare at him all day (yeah sure, your parents would be proud for sending you to school just to drool and gawk over some guy), _who has this very cute and charming smile_ (is there even anyone who doesn’t look cute while smiling?!), _who has the most adorable laugh in the world_ (sure, if adorable means boisterous—he can’t help but roll his eyes when he heard that.) and apparently the guy also sings? (He sings too—but no one seem to care about that) Since one of the girls heard him singing and said that _‘he has the most beautiful voice and that anyone who hears it would fall head over heels in love with him’ (How many times would you fall for him really?)_.

Sure the guy is _good looking_ (he’ll give him that), has _well-toned-physique_ that even him approves of (and envies) but that’s that.

He’s sick of hearing _“OH MY GOD KANG DONGHO’S PLAYING SOCCER”_ (Don’t we all play soccer in PE class!?), _“Kang Dongho smiled at me at the cafeteria_ ” (What do you want him to do then? Frown at you?) _“Kang Dongho ate the bread that I baked for him!!”_ (Do you expect him to throw it at the trash then?)

 _“I heard Kang Dongho singing as I passed by him at the hallway that I feel like I can die right now!!”_ (Why would you waste your life just because of a random person singing?) And so on.

He hasn’t even talked to the guy and only saw (read: glared) him a few times and yet he’s sick of him already and it’s only been what? A month since the school started?

If he’s gonna be completely honest it’s not because of how the girls would talk about how _amazing_ this Kang Dongho is, (yes, it’s not about that, believe me) or how even his friends wish they have the same body as the guy (which sadly, he can relate to), it’s not because of how _handsome_ Kang Dongho is either (he’s pretty _handsome_ too, by the way, just letting you know).

So why is he so irritated with Kang Dongho when he doesn’t even care about all the attention that the guy is getting in their school?

Okay screw that, he cares—but not to everyone paying too much attention and getting too whipped by the guy—it’s just one—and it all comes down to _Kim Jonghyun_.

Yes, _his_ _best friend, Kim Jonghyun_ , the one he has been _crushing_ on since he was _14_ (and even before that) _Jonghyun, his Jjuya, his precious Jju_ is classmates with Kang Dongho (SMH HERE—he still finds it unfair how they aren’t classmates now when they’ve been classmates ever since).

At first it doesn’t really bother him (it actually does—he’s just in denial), after all they would still see each other on breaks and when they go to school and go home, but every time he passes by Jonghyun’s room for a call of nature break (yes, he just have to go to the restroom on the other side because it’s a lot cleaner there and not because he wants to see a glimpse of Jonghyun) he always sees them laughing together like they’re in their own world (Jonghyun doesn’t even laugh like that unless he’s with them and Dongho’s boisterous laughter is very annoying—how the hell does Jonghyun even not notice that) that everything about the guy is just plain irritating.

Everytime he sees Kang Dongho next to his Jonghyun it annoys the hell out of him and he just wants to— _oh look_ , speaking of his **_angel_** and **_the annoying one_**

Jonghyun and Dongho are walking side by side towards them for their shared PE class (he wishes that their Principal couldn’t find another PE teacher so that he could have shared PE classes with his precious Jju), talking endlessly (how the hell do they have so much to talk about? They’ve been talking since first period—for heaven's sake! (And don’t ask me how I know that) and laughing every now and then. Jonghyun’s so cute when he’s laughing his adorable ‘he he he het’ hearing it feels like seeing a rainbow after the rain <333

Wait did Kang Dongho just hit his Jonghyun in the arm?! Like how he always does when they’re teasing each other?! The two suddenly stops and are now facing each other—what the hell is going on? Why do they have to— ** _WAIT_** **_WAIT WHY IS THAT GUY FIXING JONGHYUN’S BANGS—NO ONE TOUCHES JONGHYUN’S BANGS!!!!_** (Aside from him, that is) Jonghyun—he’s very angelic (and a little devil) bestfriend—is quite sensitive with his bangs, blame Seongwu for teasing him that he’s going bald—which isn’t even true—and even if it was, it’s okay, he can just give him his hair anyway—but going back to what’s happening _— **YOU DIDN’T JUST TOUCH MY JJUYA’S BANGS AND FOREHEAD KANG DONGHO SSI!!!! YOU—**_

“Looks like someone’s turning into the green-eyed monster again…” Seongwu says while stretching

“Who’s turning green? Is someone sick??” Daniel asks worriedly looking between him and Seongwu.

“Ask our dear Minhyunnie Niel-ah, I think he’s sick, lov—”

“SHUT UP SEONGWU.” He says glaring at the other.

“Is this because of Dong—” Seongwu covers Niel’s mouth before the guy could even finish his sentence and he looks at his friend confused at his actions. Seongwu just shakes his head which leaves him confused as hell

“Look who we have here!! Our dear Jonghyunnie~~” well not anymore, he turns to face Jonghyun and his unwanted companion as he listens to Seongwu’s daily musings for their beloved Jonghyun.

“Our precious angel of a captain, the glorious and ever kind Jonghyunnie~~” Seongwu says clinging to the other.

“Cut the crap Seongwu, I’m not your captain anymore.” Jonghyun says pushing Seongwu off of him as he goes to Daniel and do their weird fist-bump-arm-wave greeting

“Why are you always so cold to me Jjuya!?” Seongwu whines with a stomp

“Yah don’t call me that, how many times have I told you that you’re not allowed to call me Jjuya?” Jonghyun says flicking Seongwu in the head

“Then why is Bighead allowed to call you that?” Seongwu says pouting

“Because he’s my Bighead, right Mwinnie?” The other says mischievously as he drapes an arm around his shoulder, poking him on the sides—which he doesn’t mind at all, in fact he loves it when Jonghyun’s does that (which isn’t very often) especially in front of Kang Dongho. “Yes, all yours _Jjuya_.” He says with a grin. He hears Daniel mumbling ‘whipped’ and wishes he’s close to the other right now—just so he can kick him. Seongwu then winks at him (wow can their friends be less obvious?!) and Kang Dongho just laughs loudly—making him roll his eyes

“Daniel says you’re good at soccer?” Seongwu asks him, whatever Seongwu’s planning—he doesn’t like it.

“Yeah? I guess?” Kang Dongho answers with a shrug

“Position?” Seongwu asks with too much interest for his liking

“Oh… Uh…I usually play midfield or defender...?”

“Great! We’re in need of a midfielder! And you’re just perfect for the job!” Seongwu says clapping.

_GREAT._

_Just great._

_And now they’ll have Kang Dongho in their team?_

He changes his mind on kicking Daniel—Seongwu deserves that more.

He looks at Jonghyun and his best friend doesn’t look too pleased?—ah… he forgot about that. Jonghyun’s… well let’s say he isn’t really up on creating a new team for high school especially when he still blames himself for losing consecutively back when they were still in middle school—which isn’t even anybody’s fault—but that’s Jonghyun.

And as much as they kept telling him that it’s not his fault or anybody’s, their ‘ex-captain’ (as Jonghyun puts it) would just retort back an “It’s all my fault—if I wasn’t lacking as captain we would have won. Doojoon hyung, Kikwang hyung, and Yoseob’s hyung worked hard to put our school’s name there and all I did was ruin their legacy…”

“Seongwu…” Jonghyun says warning the other of his plans.

“I’m just forming the team for class Jong, chill.”   Seongwu says lacing his arms on Jonghyun—pacifying him before he switches to his alter-ego of self-blaming

“You better.” The other says in a warning as they start walking towards the bleachers.

 

“Uh….hi?” Kang Dongho says to him. “Hi” He answers back as cold as he can.

“So, uh… I’m Kang Dongho? But you can call me Dongho?” Kang Dongho says offering his hand—for what? A handshake? He ignores it.

 “Hwang Minhyun.” He says not even looking at the other.

“Yeah… I know… I heard a lot about you from Jonghyun after all…” the other says.

 _Wait what? Heard a lot about him from Jonghyun?_ “What do you mean?” He asks with interest now looking at the other.

“Uh… he told me a lot about you—no kidding with _‘a lot’_ to the point that I feel like I’ve known you just from listening to him, I guess?” Kang Dongho says looking embarrassed as he scratches the back of his neck. Jonghyun told a lot about him? “Like?” He asks he doesn’t even hide how curious he is now.

“Like how lucky he is that you bumped into him even though you covered him with his favorite ice cream, ruined his favorite shirt and made him cry, and how you thought he was a squid and not human...” Dongho chuckles. He remembers that vividly and he can’t help but smile. “When he took you to Gangneung and regretted it because you got sick because of him...”

Oh that—he wishes Jonghyun would stop blaming himself for that time—it was one of his favorite memories with Jonghyun and his family and the fact that it was actually his fault for forgetting to take his meds before going to the beach when his parents already reminded him so many times about it.

“How you brought him to his first manga store and gave him his first ever manga.”

He remembers that day—they ended up staying at the store for almost 4 hours because Jonghyun couldn’t pick what manga he should get and wants it to be the most special one (since he worked hard to give him that)—so Jonghyun ends piling up 50 mangas to choose from which lasted for an hour of him choosing as he does his weird ‘elimination game’ that resulted to him crying everytime he has to eliminate one.

He had a hard time that day, pulling the crying Jonghyun out of the manga store as he bids goodbye to all the mangas that he loves while clutching to the one that he picked, then he had to explain to Jonghyun’s parents why their son’s eyes are so swollen. Jonghyun’s parents just laughed at their adorable son, teasing him all throughout dinner and even video-calling Kahi noona just so that the other could tease her too.

And although he had a hard time because of the crying Jonghyun, he would do it all over again, even if it means his shirt will get tear stains and snot all over it (again). Jonghyun was so happy that day and kept thanking him for being the greatest best friend (like he has another lol) and his parents too—and how lucky their son is to have Minhyun in his life (though Jonghyun ruined it and said he should be the one who should be grateful—little shit right?) and of course, Jonghyun’s parents cooking his favorite food (Ah-hooooooo~~~~*does butt dance*)

“And that he’s always thankful for you, for always being there for him.” Dongho stops and looks at him with a smile. “To be honest…I envy the friendship that you two have…My family and I were always moving because of their work so we never stayed in one place… and by the time that I can call the people that I met in my previous schools ‘friends’, we have to move again… so I never really had that relationship with anyone…” Dongho says looking down.

Now he feels bad about how he always thought of the other… in a way he can understand him, because he had to leave his friends in Busan… but he was lucky to meet Jonghyun and his family… and now he can’t imagine life without them… just thinking about it makes him feel sad.

“You must’ve felt lonely then…” he mumbles. Dongho looks at him with a sad smile and nods “Yeah…I was…” he pats Dongho on the back to cheer him up “...But you have us now, so cheer up.” He says grinning at the other. Dongho looks taken aback by his sudden change of mood and it took him a few seconds to register what he said. “Ye-yeah… guess you’re right...” Dongho says smiling back like a kid who got a present.

“I’m sorry for being rude earlier… and before...” he says ashamed of his actions.

“No shit you are.” Dongho says snickering “And just to make things clear, I’m not stealing your best friend from you, I have no plans on doing that especially when all he talks about is you. I even know that your favorite underwear is the one that has Optimus Prime’s head on it—I didn’t even need to know that.” Dongho says shaking his head to get his Optimus Prime underwear out of his brain.

He feels like he’s in cloud nine learning that Jonghyun always talks about him and how thankful he is to have him in his life and at the same time he also wants to kill his best friend for even sharing his underwear preferences that even his family doesn’t know.

“Let’s start again, shall we? I’m Hwang Minhyun, you can call me Minhyun, Minhyunnie, Min, Bighead just not Mwinnie.” He says offering his hand.

Dongho chuckles and shakes his hand “Kang Dongho, you can call me Dongho, Baekho or Baek.”

“Baekho? Like white tiger??” He asks

“Yeah my mother says I resemble a white tiger and often call me that and got stuck on me.” Dongho shrugs.

“You actually do!” He says after giving him a once-over. Dongho laughs his signature laughter—whoa they’re aren’t lying when they said that his laugh is quite addicting.

“YA! HURRY UP WILL YOU!! WE DON’T HAVE ALL DAY FOR YOUR DRAMA!!” Seongwu yells at them impatiently—probably done forming their new team.

He meets Jonghyun’s eyes, face full of pride and adoration looking at him.

He winks at him and Jonghyun winks back.

Words not needed to be said, just looking at each other they already know what the other wants to say. 

 

_Thank you for doing that._

_I’m really lucky to have you._

 

_You’re welcome Jju,_

_And Likewise._


	4. 20. Defying gravity

**(19:05)**

**Sophomore year.**

_He’s only 11 steps away from Jonghyun._

_11 steps away to tell him that he’s sorry for being an insensitive ass—that he should have known better, that deep inside (really deep inside) that brat exterior—lies a man full of insecurities, of self-doubt—and that he’s only afraid too._

_11 steps away to tell him that everything will work out, that he doesn’t have to be afraid to fail, and that it’s okay to read his mangas._

_11 steps away to assure him that no matter what happens, he’ll be always there for him—even if sometimes he just wants to kill the other for being such a brat and a pain in the ass, but it’s all good—because he’s worth all that trouble and headache, and after all, he’s his ‘pain in the ass’._

_And lastly,_

_11 steps away to tell him that he loves him,_

_Always have,_

_Always will._

  **(16:05)**

“Did you and Jonghyun fight?” Dongho point-blankly asks—surprising him of his sudden appearance, that he ended up spilling the grapefruit juice that he was holding all over his notes.

Great. Just fucking great. He quickly dries it with his handkerchief hoping to salvage the neatly written notes that he worked so hard for—but just like his crumbling relationship with Jonghyun, no matter how hard he tries to remove the juice stain away—it just wouldn’t bulge.

Just like the two of them, how no one’s willing to step down from their high horses.

He throws his grapefruit juice soaked handkerchief straight to Kang Dongho’s face—who isn’t even fucking sorry for the mess that he created, and is just smugly looking at him, enjoying his fucking Americano.

“So I take that that as a yes?”

“Why? So you could steal him away this time?”

“Sure—like I even like him like that, and even if I do, we both know that it’s not gonna work. After all, no matter how much he tries to push you away—” he glares at the other “—we both know that it’s always gonna be you—the one and only, _Hwang Minhyun._ ” Dongho says proudly finishing his speech with a bow.

~•~

_College—they’re finally off to college, after a year of non-stop studying, sleep deprivation, and the constant stress and pressure for the path that they’re about to take, finally, fucking finally, they’re here._

_Well almost—they still have a two weeks left before their college life starts, and right now he’s stuck here at an AirBnB in Jeju watching his friends get wasted, courtesy of OngNiel, because apparently, they have to do the YOLO (he never knew YOLO means staying locked up in an apartment and drinking all day) and in Ong Seongwu’s ‘wise words’: “We’re young, we’re handsome, and fucking awesome—so YOLO” it doesn’t even make sense—but that’s Ong Seongwu for you._

_“Remind me again why I agreed to go on this trip with you asshats?” He says as he picks up the 9th batch of empty beer bottles laying on the floor. It’s only 8:45 in the evening and they’re stuck here in the confines of the AirBnb that they rented instead of going outside and enjoying the beautiful sceneries and food of Jeju._

_“You agreed because the plane ticket is free.” Kang Dongho states as he searches through the list of song to sing to, the only one aside from him who’s not drunk, because despite his appearance—the guy actually has zero-alcohol tolerance just like him._

_“Nah-uh!!” Seongwu drunkenly says twirling the beer bottle at them (he prays that Seongwu wouldn’t spill any beer on the floor because he just cleaned it—after Daniel ‘clumsily’ spilled his beer 30 minutes ago) “Seongwu please stop twirling that. I’m tired of cleaning after your mess.”_

_“Jjuya.” Seongwu mumbles as he pulls Jonghyun in his arms—the other’s already on the verge of being drunk to even push Seongwu away. He hears Daniel whine a ‘what about me’ and Dongho snickering at the couch. He looks at Jonghyun instead—whose face is red because of the alcohol, resembling the tomato that he hates so much._ _Jonghyun looks at Seongwu confused of his sudden actions “Mhhm?”_

_Seongwu pompously grins at him and he knows that whatever’s gonna come out of that mouth of his is not gonna be good._

_“You ‘agreed’ because of Jjuya—the one you’ve been pinning on since middle school, the one who makes the butterflies in your stomach go crazy, the one who makes everything beautiful—your one and only, Jjuya.” Seongwu theatrically says waving his arms to Jonghyun to give more emphasis as if he didn’t say too much already._

_He can feel the atmosphere in the living room turn cold—thank Ong Seongwu and his big mouth for that. Daniel and Dongho look at him worriedly asking him if he’ll be okay and if they should kill Seongwu—but he can’t answer that._ _Daniel then looks at Dongho—asking him what should they do, the other just shrugs and points his head towards Seongwu—who’s still too proud of the mess that he created._ _“Someone needs to go to bed now.” Dongho says putting the remote down and pulling Seongwu on the floor. “No—not yet!! The drama just started!!” Seongwu says whining—holding on to Jonghyun._

_He still can’t look at Jonghyun, afraid of what he’ll see once he meets his eyes—so he looks at his asshat friend instead—it’s better to look at the bastard than Jonghyun..._

_“Let’s go Ong.” Daniel says prying Seongwu’s hand off Jonghyun as he passes him to Dongho carrying the whining asshat of a friend of theirs to the room._

_“I DIDN’T USE MY PRECIOUS SAVINGS JUST SO COULD LOCK ME UP IN THE ROOM AND MISS THIS!!!” Seongwu says screaming at Dongho. He wants to badly punch their friend right now—but he can’t because he can’t even move from where his standing from._ _“I’VE WAITED 5 YEARS FOR THIS MOMENT!!! THAT WAS 5 FUCKING YEARS OF TORTURE WATCHING THEM PINNING ON EACH OTHER!!! YOU CAN’T JUST—” He hears Dongho banging the door close._

_He meets Daniel eyes—their friend whose face is always full of sunshine and rainbows suddenly looks so troubled. He nods—letting him know that it’ll be okay, that they’ll be okay._

_Hopefully._

_Daniel smiles at him apologetically before turning away._

_Time to face this Minhyun._

_You can’t hide it forever anyway…_

_And you know it’s gonna happen sooner or later._

_He looks at Jonghyun, finally meeting his eyes, reading his reaction, not even a tinge of surprise in his face. Jonghyun looks down—breaking their eye contact and it hits him_

_Jonghyun knows. He knew all along._

_Jonghyun stands and walks to the kitchen. He sees him opening two bottle of beers and walks back to where he is, handing one to him as he goes to the balcony._

_He can go straight to the room now and act like nothing happened—or not since Jonghyun and him are sharing a room—why the hell did he even decided to share a room with him? OH. BECAUSE HE’S JONGHYUN—the one he’s been ‘pinning for’ just like what Ong Seongwu said. Should he fly back to Seoul then?—what’s the use of that when they basically live next to each other? And oh—they’re also gonna share a fucking apartment!_

_“No matter how many ideas you come up with, you know it’s not gonna work Minhyun.” Jonghyun says as he takes a sip of his beer. Ofcourse, Jonghyun knows what’s running on his mind. Only Jonghyun. The one and only Kim Jonghyun._

_He looks at the other’s back that he’s so used to but now seemed so far and distant from him. “Come here Min, let’s talk.” Jonghyun tells him_

_“Since when…since whe—”_

_“Last year, when you were sick with chickenpox.” Jonghyun tells him—face without a hint of warmth—that is very unlike the Jonghyun that he knows._

_“You were having a nightmare and you keep calling my name…” he doesn’t remember that happening—all he knows that time that he was so sick and feels so out of it._ _“You… told me that… you love me.” Jonghyun says as he downs his beer. “Are you gonna drink that?” The other asks him. He shakes his head. Jonghyun takes his beer._

_He badly wants to stop him—especially when he already had a lot earlier… but he’s scared of the Jonghyun that’s by his side now—scared of the unfamiliar guy that he’d known all of his life and somehow feels like a stranger—scared of not knowing what the other’s thinking—not being able to read him like an open book—so he does nothing._

_And just waits._

_Waits for the outcome that he dreads to happen._

_Patiently waits for him as he feels himself crumble little by little._

_He always knew that this day will come. Heck he waited for this day to happen—but not like this. He always imagined it will be like those dramas that would always end up in a happy ending—but that’s life for you._

_“The night sky...it’s beautiful, isn’t it?” Jonghyun asks him all of a sudden—gazing up at the sky. He nods afraid that his voice will betray the last bit of facade—afraid to let Jonghyun know that he’s breaking into pieces._ _“You’re always like the moon to me Minhyun, always so bright, so big, and so far away—that even if I try to reach for you and do my best to stay next to you like those stars—I can’t. Because you’re far too great, far too amazing—for a petty star, like me.” Jonghyun says smiling bleakly at him._

_“Jonghyun—” He says wanting to stop him from thinking of himself like that—when in fact—it’s the other way around but Jonghyun shakes his head and he knows that this time he shouldn’t intervene._

_“I’ve always feel the same way about you Minhyun… but I’m sorry, I can’t be with you.”_

_“Why?” He asks even though he already knows the answer. Even though the answer behind all of this doesn’t even make sense—but that’s Kim Jonghyun. His Jonghyun._

_His one and only Kim Jonghyun…_

_Jonghyun wipes the tears on his cheeks that he didn’t even know was there._

_“Because you deserve someone better.”_

_“You just don’t want to be with me...” he tells him even though he knows that’s not the real reason. He leans into his palm—looking straight at him. He can read him now like an open book as he sees the hurt all over Jonghyun’s face_

_“I’ve always wanted to be with you.” The other answers in anguish rather than affection._

_This is his Jonghyun—his warm Jonghyun with all his insecurities—who always think so lowly of himself—his Jonghyun whose eyes are full of desolation, of self-doubt._

_And it pains him to see him like that—how Jonghyun’s openly revealing him his insecurities. He already knows that side of Jonghyun—but seeing it breaks him—just like how the other is breaking apart because of him._

_“Let me be selfless for once Min, okay?”_ _He wants to tell him how selfless he had always been and that there’s no need for him to do this, that even if they won’t be together it’s okay—as long as Jonghyun wouldn’t think of himself this way…_

_But he knows that’s like asking for a miracle—because Jonghyun, will always be Jonghyun—he wouldn’t believe how great of a person he is—because that’s him._

_He closes his eyes and nods to answer the other._

_He feels Jonghyun pulling him in…_

_Hugging him…_

_His warm soft lips placing a kiss on his forehead..._

 

_One day,_

_You’ll see how amazing you are Kim Jonghyun,_

_How you touch and inspire the lives of the people around you just by being yourself,_

_And when you finally see that,_

_I’ll be here,_

_With my arms outstretched,_

_Smiling proudly as I welcome you home._

~•~

 

He glares at Dongho—too annoyed (again) at the smugness in his face. “Yeah—the one and only Hwang Minhyun” He says sarcastically.

 _The one and only Hwang Minhyun that Jonghyun wouldn’t talk to and pretend that doesn’t exist for the last 15 days—and counting._ He says in his mind because he’d rather not have their friends know how their relationship is literally—well he’d rather not say it.

Jonghyun and him would often bicker on things especially when the other won’t clean up or because of him nagging too much, and that would usually last for an hour or so—but this? He never expected this to happen (well maybe a day or two—after all their so-called ‘fight’ this time isn’t something as petty as before) and he hates it.

He shares a few classes with Jonghyun—but the other doesn’t even look his way—not even acknowledging him and just sits next to that Taeyong guy (that he didn’t even know existed until Jonghyun sat next to him—sorry Taeyong guy) and when he’s home, it’s either Jonghyun’s locked up in his room or outside doing whatever he has no idea of—and hopefully not with Taeyong guy—because this time he doesn’t think they’ll be friends (ie: Kang Dongho).

“How did you found out anyway?” He asks the other

“I called him earlier to remind you guys about the dinner tonight—since you both seemed too busy to even respond to the group chat—which is driving Seongwu insane by the way.” Dongho pauses to roll his eyes, he joins him because God knows how dramatic their friend is just because they aren’t replying. “Anyway, going back, I was telling him the place and time and the funny thing is—he asked me if ‘you’re’ going. Like why would Kim Jonghyun ask me if you’re going when you’re sharing one apartment, have the same major—and basically and literally inseparable?”

Figures. Can Jonghyun be more obvious?! If the others find out—especially Ong—he shudders just imagining Seongwu pestering him and not leaving him alone til he spills the details. Horrible. Annoying. And just—“So care to explain Hwang Minhyun-ssi?” He forgot the fact that Dongho is almost like Seongwu when it comes to meddling—not as worse but almost the same. He shrugs. Not wanting to tell the other of their troubles.

“Just some petty fight about him not cleaning up Optimus Bugi’s room.”

“Yeah—sure, like he won’t talk to you just because you nagged him for not cleaning up the tortoise’s aquarium.”

“He has a _name_ Kang Dongho-ssi and it’s a _room_ not an _aquarium_ —and stop treating our _son_ like an _animal_.” He says pointedly.

Dongho just rolls his eyes at him. “I’d rather not have a discussion on the fact whether your son is an animal or not—but this isn’t some petty trouble in paradise, huh?” Wow Kang Dongho’s being so _perceptive_ today—a _first_. He would actually applaud him and even coo at him for leveling up if only the topic is not about them. So just like earlier he shrugs and studies his ruined notes instead.

“I’m not trying to intrude on whatever shit you’re both going through right now,but—” Dongho looks at him waiting for his permission to continue—as if he even has a choice. He grunts “You know how Jonghyun is, you know how he is better than any of us would—so if the little shit is being a little shit—remember, that’s just him trying to mask away whatever nasty-self-deprecating-shit is running on his mind.” And again. Wow Kang Dongho. Kang Dongho is making sense?! Actually making sense—and even spouting good advices??? Is the world about to end?!

“Stop giving me that look of ‘Kang Dongho is actually making sense’—I actually do Minhyun, I’m not just as smart as you.” Dongho says sipping his Americano

“I’m—I’m speechless Baekho-ya~ I can’t believe that you’re finally using those dormant brain cells of yours~ Can I hug you?” He says not even waiting for the other’s approval as he hugs him tight like a proud parent “Jjuya will be so proud of you~~” He says cooing at his now annoyed friend.

“Yeah please tell dad, but please kiss and make up first—before telling him.” Dongho says pushing him away.

“Yeah. I will. Thank you Dongho. Now, I have no regrets welcoming you in our group.” He says just to annoy the other.

“You’re fucking unbelievable Hwang Minhyun.” Dongho says shaking his head.

 **(19:05)**  

He really should have listen to his sister to look where he’s going because that would probably save him from this mess, but of course, he’s not Hwang Minhyun if he listens to his sister.

He sees Jonghyun’s eyes grew big and about to jump to go where he is as he defies gravity—thank heavens Dongho’s there, hugging the man that he dearly loves in place (I’ll let this slide for now Baekho).

He lands (ungracefully) sprawling out on the (very dirty) ground—he hopes that he’s not lying on dog poop or some stranger’s bubble gum—he’s wearing his favorite shirt after all.

Everything around him is a chaotic mess, horns honking, bystanders jabbering and yelling, he can’t even focus on anything as there too much going on (well, that’s not something new even if he’s not in this situation).

He can see 5 figures suddenly hovering over him,

He’s guessing that it's his beloved friends (because who else right? Unless 5 strangers with the same physique just like his friends suddenly appeared before him—because what kind of plot twist is that)

Well, he’s right anyway as he hears OngNiel™ (yes, finally they really become officially a couple—after all those flirting that they have to suffer because of the insufferable two) frantically screaming for help showering him with their saliva. If only he has the strength to—someone’s tugging on his hand, he already knows who it is without even looking, be patient my love, it’s not your turn yet.

Anyway, moving on to the 3rd person: Aron hyung—the only one who’s smart enough to call 119–he’s relieved that Sujin’s dating this smart, very reliable, yet dorky (also like a kid)—but hey no one’s perfect, everyone has their own flaws even his beloved Jonghyun (who keeps on tugging on his hand—harder this time—I told you to be patient you little shit) has tons.   

The 4th is the very infamous-‘Sexy Bandit’-Kang Dongho.

4 years ago, he hated the guy so much (he still hates him from time to time though) and now he’s one of the few that he trusts and loves—in a very brotherly way by the way (save the definitely-not-brotherly-love to the little shit who’s still tugging on him impatiently) he meets the ‘beautiful-brown-eyes-that-will-make-you-fall-in-love-with-him’ of the other and hopefully he understands what he wants to say just by looking at his beautiful face which means: ‘Asshat, make use of your well-toned-body and take care of him for me, and no touching, okay?”

He hears Dongho mumbling ‘Min’s glaring at me, he’s already dying yet he’s still rude’ (well what did he expect from the guy anyway? He already found out long ago that he’s just a dummy)

And lastly, the reason behind all this monologues,

The peanut butter to his jelly,

The One™ behind the butterflies that he feels in his tummy,

The Captain (cancel that or the ship will sink),

You already get the idea (and he can’t take the tugging anymore—it hurts like hell and he’d rather not add a dislocated shoulder on the lists of his injuries)

He looks at Jonghyun’s tear-streaked face who’s busy repeating his name like a mantra.

“Jju” he says dramatically and breathily (just like how the lead in dramas do on ep 14)

“Minhyun—God please, don’t leave me, the ambulance is coming please just wait a bit okay please please please please please please I haven’t even—” haven’t what??

Haven’t eaten? (Probably not that since they were all here to have their dinner—but well accidents happen (literally)—hopefully someone would feed his Jjuya, the boy’s already thin enough, he needs to gain some weight. So, if it isn't that, then is it haven’t taken a bath? Because if it's that—he shudders (in his mind) oh God please tell me you took a bath before going here Jju, as much as I love you and adore you, I’d rather not be touched by someone who hasn’t bathed.

But hmmm—he smells good though? Like how he smelled that late afternoon, when they’re lying on the grass watching the sun leave for the day, painting the sky and clouds a tinge of pink, purples and blue as the moon and the stars get ready for their shift in the night (too cheesy? Well that’s what happens when you fall in love)

“Min wake up min please please wake up wake up Minhyun please I promise I’ll do better, I won’t leave you-” Wake up? Is he asleep? Oh. Wait. What happened?? Everything around him is suddenly dark? And he feels tired and sleepy?? Like wait let me try something—He tries to open his eyes but he’s having a hard time even doing that, tries to moves his limbs but it’s like he can only feel the movement in his brain? Come to think of it, he doesn’t feel the rough ground that he was sprawled on, the loud noises around him became hushed whispers, which wasn’t the case earlier.

Is he dying? Is this what dying feels like? _WAIT—HOLD UP—NO NOOOO HELL NO!!! HE CAN’T DIE—HE DIDN’T SIGN UP FOR THAT! JONGHYUN DIDN’T EVEN TELL HIM THAT HE LOVES HIM FOR HEAVEN’S SAKE!!!_

He tries his best to fight the darkness and succeeds as he hears Jonghyun’s crying voice again

“Minhyun please I’ll clean our apartment everyday” _Really????_ “I promise to study now and not read mangas” _Oh...Jonghyun… its okay for you to read your mangas… I just wish you would study more..._ “I’ll do anything Please just wake up you can’t leave me and our son Minhyun please wake up you big head assho-” he doesn’t hear the last part of Jonghyun’s profanities as he gets pulled back to the darkness (again).

He wants to tell Jonghyun that of course he won’t leave him (because how could he?), and that he doesn’t need to do anything (okay maybe he does—especially the _cleaning_ and _studying_ part) but just be by his side, and maybe accept the fact that he isn’t lacking, and give in to his feelings for him too (yes Jonghyun, please cut the BS that ‘Minhyun deserves someone better’ that’s been overused by dramas already)

OUCH—that fucking—oh I’m back again? He quickly looks for Jonghyun whose face is now covered in tears, worry and fear, pounding continuously (and hard) on his chest that will probably be the cause of his death (see, this is why I told you to study Jju)

He tries to move his hand that Jonghyun’s still holding to get the other’s attention—he knows he doesn’t have much time left and he needs to talk to him—before the darkness takes him away (for the 3rd time). Jonghyun must’ve felt it because the other stopped his monologue (read:profanities) and looks at him.

He meets the other’s beautiful-round-dark-brown eyes that always reminds him of the stars.  He smiles at him, and hopefully the other would understand without him needing say it.

Jonghyun nods, understanding what he means—as always. Good.

He feels the darkness swallowing him and he knows can’t do anything about it anymore. He hears Jonghyun’s voice one last time whispering “I lo—” as he succumbs into the darkness.

_Wait—WHAT?! WHAT DID JONGHYUN SAY?!!! WHY DIDN’T YOU LET HIM FINISH?!!! WHAT KIND OF PLOT TWIST IS THIS?! THIS IS FUCKING UNFAIR!!! HE DIDN’T LIVED 20 YEARS OF HIS LIFE AS THE TOP STUDENT PINNING ON HIS BEST FRIEND JUST TO BE TREATED THIS WAY—_


	5. 27. Code Blue

_He feels a light tugging from the hand that he’s holding, urging him to look at him and he follows. He looks at him, meeting his beautiful fox-like eyes that always reminded him of the beautiful crescent moon._

_Minhyun smiles at him serenely—calming him…_

_Just like he always does..._

_Even when he knows that he doesn’t have much time left in his hands._

 

_That’s Hwang Minhyun for you,_

_Always thinking of the others before himself,_

_Always putting his coward of a best friend first before himself,_

_His Hwang Minhyun._

 

_He nods understanding what the other wants to say._

 

_It’s your turn to be patient and wait for me Jju,_

_Take care of everyone and yourself while I’m away, okay?_

_I love you,_

_Always have and always will._

_I’ll see you soon, Kim Jonghyun._

_PS: Please study, clean our house and our son’s while I’m away—I beg you._

 

_“I love you too Hwang Minhyun.” He says through his tears as he holds the man that he loves so dearly in his arms. He glances at him eyes-closed—sleeping peacefully—a tinge of smile still on his beautiful face._

 

_Don’t take too long Minhyunnie,_

_You know being patient isn’t my forte,_

_Especially when it comes to you._

_PS: I’ll study hard this time, I promise._

_Uh...I’ll try to clean… too._

**_Present_ **

 

He’s tired. Really dead tired that his legs don’t even move the way he wants it to. Can’t blame those wobbly legs of his though—they’ve been working hard for the last 30 hours keeping up with his chaotic profession.

He checks his watch and it’s already 3:15 in the morning.

 _Fuck_ —he’s fucking late—and Minhyun’s gonna throw a fit like how he always does whenever he doesn’t show up on time

Memories of them when they’re still students and how Minhyun would always wake him up because they’re gonna be late (as always) started playing on his head.

How Minhyun would always barge in his room to wake him up in different ways—depending on how deep he was sleeping and the other’s mood.

There was one time during middle school when Minhyun brought a water gun spraying him all over, which ended up him ignoring the other for 2 hours.

Another time when they’re still too young and just 1st graders, Minhyun came up with an idea on how to wake him up by using Optimus Bugi—their son—to kiss him awake (that’s what happens when you watch too much Disney movies folks) that resulted in a crying Minhyun—because he kicked him out of the bed (he deserves that).

There were a bunch of times that’s kinda boring, just Minhyun shaking him awake, or yelling at him, those are days when Minhyun’s not in the mood (meaning they’re really gonna be late because of him)

But his favorite ones are when he wakes up to his cuddles.

_Because who doesn’t love waking up to cuddles?_

 

_“Wakey-wakey Jonghyunnie~~”Oh his human alarm clock has arrive—it will be a beautiful day again._

_He does his best to pretend that he’s still asleep just so he could keep the other for him alone just for a few more minutes (and also to annoy him—because he lives to annoy the other)_

_He feels movement in his bed, Minhyun lying down next to him. He hears him chuckle (probably because of the dried drool on the corners of his lips) warm fingers touching his hair sweeping it off from his forehead (he almost flinches because of the sudden warm touch and also his forehead is a sensitive spot for him, but since its Mwinnie, it’s okay.)_

_“…So beautiful even with all the drool over your face, Jju...”_ _Minhyun mutters too low that he barely catches what the other is saying._

_He can feel his heart beat loudly—butterflies wildly fluttering their wings in his empty stomach._

_He wants to open his eyes and look at the other to tell him ‘No, you’re more beautiful, especially when you mumble my name in your sleep’ but just like before, just like the countless times that Minhyun does this to him, he remains still—too afraid to do anything—too afraid to tell Minhyun that he feels the same—because he knows that Minhyun, his precious Minhyun, deserves someone better._

_Someone who isn’t selfish,_

_Someone who won’t fail him and pull him down,_

_Someone that’s not him._

_He remembers the time when he found out how Minhyun feels about him._

_It was a year ago, they were 17 then, Minhyun was sick with chickenpox—courtesy of him—don’t blame him though—that time wasn’t his fault at all (a first)._

_Their parents told Minhyun not to visit him or he’ll have one too, he also locked his room (another first) just in case the other wouldn’t heed their parents warning, so that his clingy of a best friend couldn’t get in—but surprise surprise (not really), Minhyun has a key (as always, his best friend is always prepared) and sneaked in during the wee hours when everyone is soundly asleep (including him) cuddling with him just like the old times._

_The next morning their household woke up with a screaming Jonghyun, a too-proud of himself Minhyun (who’s still hugging him), an amused Kahi, and his parents—well let’s just say they saw that coming._

_Minhyun stayed with their family then (courtesy of Sujin kicking him out because she’d rather not be infected and have chicken pox scars all over her ‘beautiful’ skin and miss her classes *coughs* Kwak Aron) His best friend seemed okay for the next two days, even going to school, leaving him and their son Optimus Bugi (he regretted agreeing to their son’s name) all alone until the 3rd day came, Minhyun kept squirming in their bed and crying—waking him up._

_“Jonghyun no please...” he hears the other say (what the hell?) he looks at his best friend, cold sweat all over his face and about to shake the other awake—“Don’t leave me Jonghyun please...” the other begs him in his sleep._

_Why would he even leave him? It’s not like he’s going anywhere—“I love you Jonghyun please…”_

_Oh. OH. You love me? Me? Na? Kim Jonghyun?_

_This Kim Jonghyun???_

_“I love you Jju… please… please don’t go…”_

_Yes—definitely him._

_He looks at his best friend a myriad of emotions running through him:_

_Confusion, amazement, worry, adoration, uneasiness, and lastly exhilaration and fear._

_Because as much as he’s happy that Minhyun feels the same way, he knows deep down that there’s no use… that it will just result him hurting his precious Minhyun…_

_Because it can’t be him, and that’s the reason why he kept all this feelings locked away all to himself._

 

_He feels warm soft lips brush on his forehead pulling him back to the present, wherein he’s still pretending to be asleep. Minhyun slings an arm to his side—pulling him close to his chest._

_“Time to wake up Jjuya—or I’ll burn your mangas as you peacefully sleep tonight~~” His best friend impishly whispers in his ear._

_Did he say Minhyun deserves someone better?_

_Well if he did, cancel that._

_Minhyun doesn’t deserve anyone._

_And should be single all his life._

 

He chuckles. As always, Hwang Minhyun never disappoints. He shakes his head and forces his body to stand so that he could take a shower—because God forbid the ruckus Minhyun will do if he finds out that he didn’t clean himself up before going _home_.

_Only 11 more minutes love,_

_Only 11 more minutes and I’ll be there with you._

 

_“Why is Minhyun crying again Jonghyun?” His noona asks him, arms crossed on her chest using her ‘noona tone’—too bad it’s not gonna work on him as he’s still too pissed (at the moment) at the crying boy (for the second time today) on the other side of the playground. He doesn’t answer his sister and instead shovels a sand to his bucket (which is a brave move of him—and he’ll probably suffer the consequences of it later)_

_“Jonghyun.” His noona says—issuing the first warning. Nope—Jonghyunnie is still too upset so he doesn’t answer and shovels another batch of sand for their—no for his castle since he kicked Mwinhyun out of the sandbox (literally)._

_“Kim Jonghyun.” Second warning—uh-uhh still too upset so no answers for you noona. He puts some water on his bucket and mixes it—making sure it sticks together so that ~~their~~ his castle won’t collapse._

_“Don’t make me call your name again Jonghyun, I’m serious.” Third and final warning—and No, he won’t answer. It’s Mwinnie’s fault anyway. He hears his noona sigh—realizing that she won’t get him to talk and apologize to the crying big headed best friend of his._

_His noona plops down in front of him—destroying one of the castle gates that he and Mwinhyun put a lot of effort on. He glares at his sister and the other just shakes her head—giving up on her stubborn little brother._ _“You’re really a handful at times Jonghyun...” His sister says, playing with their destroyed gates. “Why did you make him cry again, little devil?” She asks looking straight at him, this time without the ‘noona tone’ and just his normal-sweet-and-loving-noona that he always clings to._

_“Ish his fawlt.” He says with a pout. He tips the bucket and builds another castle_

_“That’s what you said too earlier when you made him cry for not sharing his ice cream with you.” Kahi tells him pinching his nose_

_“Shawing is cawing noona, best fwiends should shawe ice cweams.” He huffs and pouts_

_“You’re right, but you should also ask for his permission first—before licking it all over.”_ _He doesn’t answer and just grunts—he already apologized (half-heartedly) for that earlier so keeps himself busy instead with ~~their~~ his castle_

_“If you keep making Minhyunnie cry, they’ll move back to Busan and you’ll never see him again.”_

_He stops—that can’t be true right? His Mwinnie wouldn’t move away and leave him just because he made him cry (a couple of times) right?_

_“Is that what you want Jonghyun? To never see your best friend again?”_

_Never see his best friend again?? No!! He doesn’t want that!! He stands and walks over to their castle (destroying it too) dashing to the sobbing boy._ _He hears his sister chuckling as she follows behind._

_“Mwinnie!! Jonghyunnie ish sowwyyyyyy!!! Pwease pwease down’t weave mweeeeee!!!!!” He says hugging the other tight._

_Minhyun looks at him confused—his fox-like eyes swollen “Why would I leave you?” The other asks sniffing_.

_“Noona sawd youw’ll weave mwe fow mwaking you cwy...” he looks down feeling guilty of his actions._

_“I won’t Jonghyunnie… I promise. ” Minhyun says hugging him back_

_“I’wm sowwy Mwinnie… I pwomise not tyu mwake you cwy agwain…” He says hugging him tighter._

_“I’m sorry too, and I’ll share my ice cream with you from now on and… Allow you to kiss me.” The other says shyly smiling at him._

_“Excuse me? Allow to what?? Kiss? What the Barbie is Minhyun talking about?! You’re just 5 Jonghyun!! Where did you even learn that??” His noona says looking at them as Sujin laughs beside her_

_“Apparently, the reason behind the fight this time is because Minhyun didn’t allow Jonghyun to kiss him—kicking him literally out of their ‘castle’.” Sujin says shaking with laughter._

_“What??? Why would he even do that??” Kahi asks the other._ _Sujin just shrugs “Ask your brother—I have no idea either.” Sujin replies._

_Kahi looks at him in the eye—curiosity all over her face “My dear adorable little devil of a brother please tell us the reason behind your uh—actions?” She asks gently and he nods_

_“Papa ohways shaid that we shouwld kish the wones we wuvv~ thatch’s why he ohways kishes us befowe he weaves and gwets howme~ sow I towld Mwinnie that we shouwd kish too~ bwut he shaid no! and weven pwush mwe away!” he huffs and glares at Mwinhyun who’s looking at him apologetically—guilty of his bad actions—good._ _“Sow I kicked him out!!” He says proudly with a beam_

_Sujin noona burst out laughing and her sister?  Let’s say she turned into a life-sized Barbie (not the attractive one though) with her eyes bug out and mouth hanging open._

_“Aigoooo~~ our Jonghyunnie~~” Sujin says cooing at him and hugging him away from Mwinhyun. His best friend must’ve not like it because he’s glaring at his sister—prying her hands away._ _“Our precious Jonghyunnie~~ he has a point you know~~ you should kiss the person that you love unnie.” Sujin says teasing his sister as Mwinhyun pulls him back to his side._

_“Yeah sure Sujin, you should also kiss that transfer student.” Kahi says running away_

_“Unnie!! You promised to keep that a secret!!!” The other says running after his sister._ _He shakes his head—there sisters’ are just the same as them—less the crying._

 _He feels Mwinhyun nudge him on the side like he’s waiting for something._ _“Whhhhhy?” He asks confused of the other._

  _“I’m ready.” Mwinhyun says puckering his lips._

_Ready for? Oh—that. He stares at his best friend who looks so adorable—his eyes closed and crinkling—his adorable lips puckered making kissy noises—waiting for him. He giggles_

_“Sowwy~ Jonghyunnie chwanged his mwiiiind~~” he says giggling as runs away._

_“YA!!! No fair Jonghyunnie!!! You can’t just change your mind after making me cry!!!” Mwinhyun yells after him_

_“Thwen cwy agwain Mwinnie~~”’ he yells back_

 

 

He carefully enters their dimly lit room and puts down the cake and the flowers that he bought earlier for Minhyun to celebrate their anniversary. But as usual, the other’s just peacefully sleeping on their shared bed.

He sighs—he should be used to it by now, but a part of him still hopes that maybe—just maybe on a special day like this, things will be different and he’ll go home to a conscious Minhyun—but I guess that’s not gonna happen today.

He removes his coat and hangs it on the dresser—he finally learned how to do that and is now used to keeping his things organized instead of just throwing it everywhere.

He checks up on their son, Optimus Bugi, who is also sleeping peacefully in the house that he and Minhyun built 20 years ago. “Like father like son eh?” He gently pats him on the back—careful not to wake their son up.

 

_Their parents are late, they should be back an hour ago, after all—it’s his birthday and they promised._

_He plops down on the sofa and pouts—crossing his arms. Minhyunnie then sits next to him, putting an arm around his shoulder, patting it—calming him down before he goes into a tantrum again._

_“They’ll arrive soon Jjuya, don’t worry.”_

_“That’s what you all said too an hour ago, and the hour before that, and the hour hour before that.” He tells them with a huff._  

_“Jonghyun.” His sister eyes him—warning him_

_“Whyyyyyyyy?!” He answers back_

_“Uh-oh… someone needs his choco milk—lemme just get that...” Sujin says standing up, signaling Minhyun to join her—his best friend shakes his head not wanting to—Sujin then glares at him._ _“I’ll be back Jju.” Minhyun says sighing as he follows his sister. He grunts in reply._

_“Kim Jonghyun.” Kahi calls him—the first step on disciplining his behavior._

_“What.”_

_“Kim Jonghyun.” Second step—enforcing the ‘noona authority’ he sighs and looks at her._

_“Yes noona.”_

_“What did momma and papa say about throwing tantrums?”_

_“It’s not good…” Kahi stands and sits next to him, pulling him close._

_“Uh huh… we understand how you feel… but you shouldn’t take your anger out on someone or anyone…”  Kahi tells him stroking his hair_

_“I’m sorry noona…” he says looking up—Kahi smiles at him warmly_

_“It’s okay… like I said… we understand… just don’t do it again, okay?” He nods._

_“Uh sorry to interrupt but we actually run out of choco milk?” Sujin tells them_

_“We have some at home, should we head there?” Kahi answers the other with a smirk_

_“We should—let’s go!” Sujin says with a wink_

_He looks at Minhyun—confused with their sisters’ weird actions especially when he knows that they still have choco milk in the fridge—Minhyun just shrugs. Weird._

_~_

_“Happy birthday uri Jonghyunnie!!!” Their parents welcome him with a pop of confettis and a shower of kisses—well more like his momma and papa are just kiss-squishing his cheeks on each side._

_“Happy birthday Jonghyunnie” Mama Hwang tells him as she puts his birthday hat._ _“Thanks mum” he says hugging her. Mama Hwang pats him on the head as she goes to the kitchen with his momma._

_He hears Minhyun whining at his dad that the string is too tight, Dada Hwang chuckles and stretches it—so that it could fit his bighead._

_“Happy birthday baby Jju!” Dada Hwang says tousling his hair._

_“I’m not a baby anymore dada. I’m 7!”_

_“Really? But you still look like a baaaaby~” Dada Hwang teases him_

_“I’m not!! I’m a big boy now!” He answers with a pout._

_“He’s right you know, Jjuya is a big boy, a big baaaaby boy that is~” His Papa says joining Dada Hwang in teasing him._

_“Mum!!! Papa and Dada are calling me a baby!!” He whines making their fathers’ laugh in amusement_

_“Sometimes I feel like I’m raising two boys instead of one.” His mother says as they put the dishes to the table._

_“You’re not the only one dear, I even ask myself who’s the kid in the family at times.” Mama Hwang adds._

_“They do know that we can hear them right?” Dada Hwang says carrying Minhyun, his father does the same “They’re probably saying that so we can hear them—but do we really act like kids?” His papa asks_

_“YES.” He and Minhyun answer at the same time making the four of them laugh as they go upstairs._

_“Why are we going to my room? Aren’t we gonna eat? The noonas will finish my cake papa—”_

_“Don’t worry, we bought two cakes today just for that, but first we’re going to show you boys something.” Papa says opening the door._

_He looks at his room and he sees nothing different, his room looks the same as it was this morning—neat and organized (courtesy of Minhyun’s nagging)._

_“Jju look!!” Minhyun says pointing at something underneath his bed. He goes down and sees a pair of small beady eyes—arms hidden in his shell_

_“Papa!!! Thank you!!” He quickly hugs his papa, showering him in kisses and joins Minhyun as he calls the tortoise out of the bed._

_“You should thank dada too Jonghyunnie, we both got that for you.” his father says. He quickly runs to Dada, hugging him and kissing him “thank you dada!” And goes back to Minhyun not waiting for a reply. “You’re welcome baby Jju. Guess we should leave them now?” His father chuckles and nods closing the door._

_The tortoise finally comes out of his bed, he immediately carries it in his arms. "_ _What should we name him Jju?” Minhyun says as he pets him._

_“Binggu?”_

_“Why would you name him that?” Minhyun shakes his head in disapproval._

_“How about Kamja then?” He asks him. Minhyun shakes his head—not liking it again._

_“You suck at naming Jju, lemme think of something.” He grunts and looks around, he sees a box and sack of soil near the door—their fathers as usual forgot to tell them about it._

_“Min, look” he says pointing his lips at the door. Minhyun grabs it and pulls it towards them “Is this his house?” He nods._

_Minhyun opens the box and takes the frames out. He takes the manual with his other arm not wanting to put down their son—wait their son? He looks down at the tortoise in his arm and Minhyun whose busy reading the instructions on the box—Minhyun looks at him “Is there something wrong?” The other asks him_

_“N-nothing… I-I guess?” Minhyun looks at him trying to read his face and he quickly looks down—averting his gaze._ _“H-how about we name him from one of your favorite characters and mine?” He asks, distracting him._

_“Then combining it?” He nods “Hmm… that’s a good idea...” Minhyun says as he starts assembling the frame. He puts down their son and joins him—before the other nags him on how he’s doing all the work._

_They’re almost done and just about to put the soil in when he thought of a good name_

_“Bu—”_

_“Opti—” they both say at the same time._

_“You first Jju!”_

_“No you first!”_

_“It's your birthday, so you first!”_

_“Fine—how about Bugi?” He asks. “Like the shortened version of Onibugi the Pokemon?” Minhyun seems to like the name—seeing how he’s not complaining on his idea yet._

_“Hmmm… it’s good and it fits perfectly with mine.” Minhyun tells him smiling._

_“Your turn!” He asks too excited to hear his best friend's idea._

_“Optimus!” Minhyun says with a beam and he can’t help but grimace—he should’ve seen that coming, well at least it’s not bumblebee._ _“Whaaaaaaat? You don’t like the name?” He shakes his head—it was his idea after all to name their son with their favorite characters, and who is he to complain when he named their son after a Pokemon? And Minhyun’s right the name perfectly fits their son. “So???” Minhyun asks him again._

_“Optimus Bugi it is.” He answers with a smile._

 

He puts the bouquet of Camellias in the vase, puts the cake in the fridge, then goes to the bathroom to wash his hands—because Minhyun wouldn’t be happy to know that he touched him with his germ-induced fingers (yes—that’s how a neat freak he is).

He glances on the sleeping prince on their bed—hoping that maybe he’ll be awake this time, but just like earlier, the other’s just peacefully sleeping—just like sleeping beauty.

Guess I will celebrate alone as usual. 

He takes a can of beer in their mini fridge (he deserves that much on his off and the other can’t drink anyway), and walk towards his sleeping beauty, he switches on the lamp and sits on their bed so that he could look at the love of his life without straining his eyes.

He can’t help but smile at how beautiful the other is even when he’s sleeping. He brushes his hair away and plants a kiss on his forehead to let him now that he’s arrived—that he’s home.

He reaches for the medical chart that’s hanging at the end their bed, checking the other’s assessment and progress notes for the day as he enjoys his beer. Vital signs, respiratory patterns are all normal and oh—“Did you smile at your nurse today again Minhyunnie?” he asks him teasingly. “I’m really getting jealous—you always do something when Jinyoung’s here.” He says as he puts back the chart.“Is it because I’m always late?” he asks as he takes his hand “You know, I can’t do anything about that, it’s not like I can control what happens in the ER Min...” he says taking a long sip of beer remembering the patient they had earlier.  

“…We had a Multi trauma patient today…” Images of the bloodied injured boy pops in his head—the boy was about to meet his friends when a car collided with him (Very spot on right?) “It reminded me so much of that day—that I—I just stood there frozen… and got yelled at by the chief to get my shit together or get out.” His voice shaking so he tries to keep himself together by looking down on their hands.

“I was scared Min… scared that I wouldn’t be able save him… scared that I’ll make a mistake and cause his…” he doesn’t continue. “I was too damn scared… and I wish you were there with me, telling me ‘You can do this Jonghyun’....as we both do our best to save him… just like how you planned us to be before I fucked everything up...”

 

_He’s in his paradise, enjoying the smell of his newly bought manga when Minhyun suddenly appears barging in their apartment with a loud noise._

_He glares at him. What the hell? Why are you here when you’re supposed to be studying at the library? Minhyun glares back at him—not even looking away as he hears him open his bag and take something out._

_Minhyun throws a bunch of papers on the sofa table. Fuck—he found out._

_He sees his test papers that’s adorned with red F’s and the envelope containing his grades—that he was sure that he threw in the trash can outside of their building._

_He doesn’t look at him not wanting to meet the other’s rigid cold eyes—that’s full of disappointment because of him,_

_Because he’s a walking epitome of failure._

_Minhyun then kicks him on the knee—urging him that he should look at him. He shakes his head—to tell the other that he doesn’t want to._

_Because what’s the use? He already knows what’s running on his best friend’s mind._

_Would it do any good if he looks at him?_

_When he knows that he’ll only see how much of a failure he is in the eyes of his beloved?_

_And that no matter how much he tries he can never live up to his expectations?_

_Reminding him where they will always stand—that no matter how much he tries to climb up and stand next to him—he can never ever do that._

_Because after all—he is just a petty star compared to the glorious moon that is Hwang Minhyun._

 

_“Look at me Jonghyun.” Minhyun forces him—holding his face. He doesn’t bulge and looks at the clock instead._

_“JONGHYUN.” Minhyun says with authority. Letting him know that there’s no use of him avoiding this,_ _that he can’t run away, that he should face him now or they’ll stay like this the whole day._

_He looks at him—meeting his eyes._

_He sees a myriad of emotions run on his beautiful face: Betrayal, hurt, anger, sadness, worry, and anguish._

_He can feel himself breaking apart—for making Minhyun feel this way—for hurting him again—when he promised that he won’t ever do that again since their confrontation in Jeju._

_But that’s him,_

_That’s Kim Jonghyun,_

_The one who would always hurt the people that he loves._

_Because Kim Jonghyun is selfish._

_And will always be selfish._

_“When are you going to tell me Jonghyun?” Minhyun tells him—his beautiful voice masked with hurt and betrayal._ _“I was about to tell you.” He lies. “I was just waiting for the perfect time.” Another lie._

_Minhyun laughs at him darkly “Perfect time?” He shrugs looking away. Minhyun holds his chin in place—forcing him to look at him again—like how a parent would do on their problem child._

_“And when is that Jonghyun? When you’re fucking kicked out of med school?!” The other says fuming—abruptly letting go of his face—completely opposite to his warm Minhyun._

_“I’m sorry. I messed up.” He says half-heartedly. Because he didn’t messed up—he fucked up. Ruining his parent’s hard work to support him in med school because he could hardly have time to even sleep let alone do part time jobs to pay for his tuition._

_Ruining Minhyun’s plans of them standing side by side—attending to their patients, saving lives—because just like what the other said, he’ll be kicked out—sooner rather than later._

_Minhyun picks up his manga and shakes his head—amused that he still has the audacity to leisurely read when his life is crumbling into pieces._

_“Messed up is when you fail a subject or two Jonghyun, you failed all of your subjects which means you fucked up and about to hit rock bottom if you still won’t get your shit together. Though I’m glad that you still have the time to read your mangas, maybe next time you should use that to fucking study instead.” Minhyun tells him in distaste, throwing the manga next to him—making him feel..._

_“Well I’m sorry that I’m not as smart as you, as hardworking as you, and as glorious as you are—because that’s you, Hwang Minhyun—and I’m just Kim Jonghyun, the ugly stain in your pristine white shirt.”_

_He stands and goes to his room banging the door._

_He leans to it, coming to his senses—realizing what he just did. He doesn’t know why he had to open his stupid mouth and blame the other when everything Minhyun said was the truth._

_He hears Minhyun’s footsteps on the opposite of the door—a sigh coming from the other._

_He hears his footsteps again, this time walking away._

_Walking away from him,_

_Like how he should have done before._

 

He takes a sip of his beer only to find out that he already finished everything. “Let me just get another one Min, I’ll be back.” He kisses him before heading to the fridge, he goes back right away and instead of sitting on the bed he sits on his so-called ‘thinking chair’ (as their noonas’ call it) taking Minhyun’s hand, pressing a kiss on it.

He closes his eyes—basking in the warmth coming from the other… he can smell Minhyun’s scent—the smell of his home.

He can feel Minhyun’s warmth engulfing him—igniting the feelings that he tried so hard to suppress.

_Remorse. Guilt. Doubt. Worry. Pain._

He feels his chest tightening—his breath growing shorter by the second. He’s having his attack again.

_Breathe in—Relax Jonghyun—Breathe out—think of good things—Breathe in—happy memories—breathe out—think of your family and friends—breathe out._

_Think of Minhyun_

_Minhyun smiling radiantly as he calls his name_

_Minhyun nagging him to eat_

_Minhyun hugging him_

_Minhyun who’s always at his side—embracing him, helping him overcome the negative feelings and replacing it with, Acceptance, Hope, Warmth,_

_And Love._

 

He opens his eyes and looks at him. “Thank you.” he tells him as he kisses his hand. Smiling adoringly at the man in front of him. “You know what day is it today right?” He pauses, waiting for Minhyun’s answer, telling him _‘of course, how would I not know?’_ he smiles and leans on the other’s hand—as if the other’s caressing his face.

“Ding dong daeng~~ you’re right, today’s the anniversary when we first met.” He says chuckling “Can you believe that’s it’s been 22 years since that day? When your always-distracted-bighead-self bump on me, covering me with ice cream and making me cry?” he says teasingly

“I gave you a hard time back then didn’t I? You must’ve been so flustered because I was such a brat—well still is— _at times_ —as our noonas remind me from time to time.” He rolls his eyes remembering that time when they _first_ tied him on his _thinking chair_.

 

_“It’s been a year noona!! And he’s still not awake!” he says yelling angrily—exploding at their sisters and Aron after the doctors told them that Minhyun is ‘doing better and progressing well’—in his coma state._

_“How the hell is that ‘doing better’?!” He spats—running his hands on his hair as he walks back and forth the room—furious at the doctor’s lies—feeling hopeless—that…Minhyun… Minhyun… will never…_

_“Don’t.” Sujin tells him reading his face—he can see the hurt and pain across her beautiful face. "_ _You of all people should believe in him Jonghyun—if there’s someone who would know how hard…” Sujin looks at her brother—biting her lip—to keep her from crying. Aron walks to her side, stroking her back “…how hard he is trying—fighting to stay alive every fucking day—doing his best even in this state…that…that  would be you.”_

_Sujin tells him—face serious—reminding him of the reasons why he should believe… how he should never doubt… how he should not give up hope—because Minhyun…will always do his best… to fight his way… to return to them…Just like how he promised him that day… and MInhyun never breaks his promises._

_He looks at Minhyun… feeling guilty… “I’m sorry…” he mumbles looking down at  the floor… ashamed for doubting him—ashamed for his actions… ashamed for hurting Sujin’s feelings… ashamed of himself…_

  _“Stop…” Sujin says embracing him “Stop blaming yourself Jonghyun-ah…” she tells him caressing his face_ _“Stop thinking so badly about yourself—if it weren’t for you, if it weren’t for you French-kissing him—”_ _He rolls his eyes_ _“It’s called CPR noona—not French-kissing” he hears his sister and Aron erupting in laughter._

_“Yeah-whatevs, I’m an aspiring fashion designer not a doctor. Anyhoo, wait where was I?” Sujin asks the two, Kahi rolls her eyes and walks over them—joining their cuddle time_

_“So, as Sujin was saying, stop doing this self-blaming-I’m-always-the-cause-of-everyone’s-pain-because-I’m-a-walking-failure bullshit Jonghyun” SuRon clapping at the side—amazed by his sister words “It’s not doing you good—and you’re only hurting yourself and us—and not because you think you’re a ‘walking failure’ and drag us along with it—it was never that. It hurts us to see you this way, our precious bratty boy…” Kahi tells him pushing him to sit over the chair and nods at Sujin, who suddenly smiles wickedly and unbuckles her belt—he gulps_

_“Our precious Jonghyunnie, you are a bundle of sunshine, who always inspires the people around you, who motivates them to work harder and helps them get back on their feet. You always have that effect on people Jonghyun-ah, and it’s about time you realize how great of a person you are.” Kahi ends as unbuckling her belt too_

_“I-I do?” he asks scared on what’s about to happen to him._

_“Yes, definitely our Jonghyunnie~ do you think I would like you for my brother, if you weren’t? Well aside from you being handsome and charming.” Sujin tells him as she starts tying him up on chair_ _“Done here.” Sujin tells his sister “Done!” His sister replies._

_He looks down at their sisters’ work. He’s tied down on the chair courtesy of their Evil ~~step~~ sisters. “Uh—what’s this supposed to be?” he asks_

_“This—” Sujin says waving her arms on her work “Is your thinking chair.”_

_“E-excuse me?”_

_“From now on, you’re only allowed to sit here and think of good positive things that you did and will do in your life and everything else.” His sister adds_  

_“I can’t control what’s going on my mind noona.”_

_“You can Jonghyun.” Sujin says beaming at him “And You will.” Kahi adds with finality_

_“And here I thought 2Hyun are the crazy ones...” Aron mumbles_

_“Did your boyfriend just compared us to these two idiots?”_

_“I should break up with him—the audacity of comparing us to these losers!!”_

 

“I miss you so much Minhyun…I thought that I’ll get used to this as time passes… but I was wrong as usual… I miss you more everyday… every time something funny happens, I would think ‘Minhyun would probably roll his eyes when he hears this and tell me _‘that’s lame Jju, I have something funnier’_ or when I feel like everything’s crumbling again you would tell me that _‘everything will be okay Jonghyun…everything will be okay…’_ and when I did something good, I would see you, proudly beaming at me—as if I saved the world.” He chuckles

“I even miss your annoying mechanical laughter and how you always nag me to clean up. Do you remember that day when you threw my notes in the trash? And hugged me so tight? I regretted not telling you how much I always love it when you hug me, how you make me feel whole and forgot the past me, just by your warmth embrace.”

 

 _“It’s only been a week since we moved in here Jonghyun, and yet you turned it into a dumpsite already.”_ _Minhyun tells him annoyed—picking up the papers scattered all around their living room and throwing it into the trash._

_“Don’t!!! Those are my notes!!!!” He says yelling at the other. Minhyun looks at him quizzically “Notes?”_

_“Yes those are my notes you idiot!” He says salvaging his ‘neatly’ written notes in the trash can. Minhyun helps him collect it still looking confused._ _He walks to the living room and flops on the floor, trying his best to smoothen his now wrinkly notes. Minhyun sits on the sofa and picks one that fell on the floor (again)—and looks at it—confusion still all over his face._

_“Jonghyun, when you said ‘notes’ did you mean notes from our classes? Like you’re actually writing notes from lectures now?” The other says staring at the paper—amazed and at the same time trying his best to decipher his handwriting._

_“Uh huh” he answers still busy smoothing every paper. Minhyun hands him the paper and back-hugs him—surprising the shit out of him—that he almost had a heart attack_

_“What?” He asks as if he’s irritated, just so the other wouldn’t know how much he’s liking the back-hug—especially after what he did to him in Jeju…_

_He shakes his head to get rid of the memories of that painful night not wanting to ruin the mood, when they’re finally back to normal after walking on eggshells around each other for a month._

_“I can’t believe that there will come a day when my Jjuya is actually studying and even writing notes~~~” Minhyun says cooing at him, kissing the top of his head. He can feel his face heating up—and thank God Minhyun couldn’t see his face or else the other would tease him the whole day and coax him (again) to just give in to his feelings—casually—too casually that somehow irritates him (but deep inside he’s loving it and wants him to do it more)._

_“Optimus!!” Minhyun calls their son who’s just innocently enjoying his lunch “My dear son, your dad is studying!!! Can you believe it?” their son looks at them—cabbage still on his mouth—confused at the sudden interruption._ _“I feel like I can die right now Optimus!!” Minhyun says as he hugs him tighter—making him feel whole—making him think he’s deserving—making him forget who he is._

_Well—almost._

 

_‘It’s sad that he’s so unlike Minhyun…’_

_‘Yeah… you’d think that after growing up together and being inseparable, Minhyun’s intelligence and diligence would somehow brush off him—but I guess that’s just how opposite they are.’_

_He hears the other teachers say as he gets reprimanded by their homeroom teacher for jumping over the wall again._

 

_‘Minhyun deserves a better friend, why is he hanging out with that otaku anyway?’_

_‘Couldn’t agree more—though Jonghyun is kinda cute, but he’s nothing compared to the glorious Hwang Minhyun.’_

_The girls on the other class say as he walks towards Minhyun whose busy laughing with their friends._

 

_‘What’s the point of trying out for the team, when Jonghyun would just choose his friends anyway?’_

_‘Right, I still don’t understand why Doojoon hyung chose him to be the next captain—when Jonghyun is just one selfish bastard.’_

_He hears the other guys say as he changes his shirt in the locker room._

 

_Almost._

_“Die then.” he mumbles and shakes the other off of him._ _Minhyun hugs him tighter—too tight that he could barely breathe—leaning on him—his bighead resting on his shoulder… perfectly in place… as if they’re puzzle pieces._ _“Can’t—not until you tell me that you love me.” Minhyun mischievously whispers in his ear—giving him goosebumps…and—no—don’t think about it Jonghyun, don’t let your imagination run wild again_

_“Guess you’ll outlive our son then.” Minhyun laughs loudly, damaging his ear drum._

_“Guess I will.”_

 

“And how you used to get jealous with Dongho…” he chuckles. “I can’t believe you did that—the boy was scared as hell.” He shakes his head remembering how Dongho was so afraid of Minhyun even with his huge built. Poor Dongho—the princess didn’t even do anything and just wanted to have friends but have to suffer Minhyun’s scrutinizing gaze every time he sees him with him.

 

_He’s starving. Minhyun woke him up extremely late today, had to suffer Minhyun’s constant nagging (as usual) as he takes a bath, wore his uniform and even when they went downstairs—Minhyun didn’t stop nagging—literally—that he forgot to grab the sandwich that his momma made for them for breakfast that resulted in another round of nagging from Minhyun because they have to walk to school with an empty stomach and miss his mother’s delicious sandwich. It’s a relief that they don’t share the same class anymore or he’ll probably be nagged the entire day._

_He takes his usual seat next to Dongho who’s looking at the door—with a frightened expression._ _“Everything okay?” he asks the other._

_“Yeah… it’s just that scary guy—glaring at me again...” The other answers looking down_

_He looks at the door and he doesn’t see any guy aside from Minhyun who’s now winking at him as Daniel pushes him towards their classroom._ _“I don’t see any weird guy though?” He tells him. Well—cancel that, he sees Seongwu, who’s blowing kisses to him—definitely weird guy._ _“Okay, I actually saw one. But that guy’s harmless—in a way.” he says tilting his head towards the weird guy at the door._

 _Dongho then chuckles, a bit too loud, which hypes Seongwu leading him to blow more kisses in their way._ _“Is he your friend?” Dongho asks him, a smile blooming on his face—good. “Sadly.” He waves his hand to Seongwu telling him to come inside._

_“So I guess my flying kiss worked?” Seongwu says presumptuous as always._

_“No.” He rolls his eyes. He waves his hand at Dongho to introduce the two. “Dongho this is Seongwu—the weird guy, weird guy—this is Dongho, be nice Seongwu and don’t humiliate me, please and thank you.” He says urging them to do a hand shake, a fist bump, or whatever._

_Dongho laughs and he can’t help but smile at the other. Seongwu on the other hand looks at him offended with what he said, a hand on his chest—emphasizing how hurt he is._

_He rolls his eyes—As usual. Dramatic as always._

_“I’m highly offended Jjuya, first off, I’m not weird. You can’t introduce this Hellenistic-self of mine as weird guy because that’s just rude.” He groans._

_Why did he even introduce Seongwu to Dongho again?_

_“Second, I’m always nice—too nice, especially to you!!! You’re my favorite—”_

_“Like I said, harmless, dramatic most times and a bit vain, but he doesn’t bite—well, sometimes he does, but I swear he’s harmless.” He tells Dongho whose busy laughing at them._

_“I-I n-never said h-he’s the scary guy” Dongho tells them in between laughs._

_“Thanks so much for clearing that up sweetie~” Seongwu says winking at Dongho._ _He hears Dongho mumble ‘anytime’—already charmed with Seongwu_

_“But scary guy? Who??” Seongwu asks them hands on his hips._

_“Some weird guy kept glaring at Dongho like every day.”_

_“What does he look like?” Seongwu asks Dongho_

_“Uhm…tall…good looking…and gives of the ‘don’t mess with me’ aura...” Dongho says shrugging_

_“Tall, good looking, and ‘don’t mess with me aura’? Isn’t that me and Niel?”_

_He scoffs. “Why would Niel even do that?” he says sarcastically. “Niel couldn’t even hurt a damn fly—literally and cries when he accidentally steps on an ant.”_

_“Again, I’m offended how you only said good things about Niel, when you’re always so cold to me Jjuya. I don’t deserve this unjust treatment.”_

_“Stop calling me that—only Minhyun can call me that.” He tells him. Seongwu then starts making faces as he mimics him._

_“I’ve met Daniel before, but Minhyun?” Dongho asks him_

_“You haven’t met Minhyun yet? I’m surprised—I can’t believe you introduced me first before him Jjuya!! Are you perhaps favoring me over him now? And again I’m offended how you clearly show favoritism towards Niel, the audaci—”_

_“I have to introduce the nicest and least crazy one to not scare Dongho away.”_

_“I’ll just pretend that I didn’t hear that. But anyway, Mr. Sexy Bandit from Jejudo~” Dongho coughs embarrassed of the nickname that he earned._ _“Minhyun is our dear Jjuya’s—” he glares at Seongwu “precious best friend. He has a big head, tall, and kinda hand—wait. Is it perhaps Minhyun?” Seongwu asks looking at him and Dongho_

_“Why would Minhyun even do that?”_

_“Uh… I don’t know, maybe because he’s jealous?” Seongwu says teasingly._

_“Again—why?” He asks._ _Seongwu breathes out exasperatedly “because—”The bell rings cutting of Seongwu as it announces the start of first period._ _“Unbelievable. Even the school bell sides with Hwang Minhyun.” Seongwu says chuckling darkly—too amused. “Laters baby~” Seongwu says winking at them as he walks out from their room like a model on a runway._

_“You have amazing friends Jonghyun...” Dongho says handing him a granola bar from his bag_

_“I have a bunch of immature crazy kids as friends—which includes you by the way.” He says winking at him as he takes a bite of the granola bar. Dongho smiles at him—touched by his words._

_“Stop being mushy asshat!” Dongho says nudging his arm “But you love this mushy-asshat.” He says pouting at the other._

_“Yeah—” Dongho says stopping midway looking at the door. He follows him but he doesn’t see weird-glaring-guy or anyone?_ _Well aside from the back of Minhyun’s head, who’s probably on his way to the restroom. Wait—Dongho said that the scary guy would usually pass by the room when he arrives right?_

_Or sometimes when they’re laughing and talking just like now? But why would Minhyun?_

_No, probably not Minhyun. His Minhyun isn’t that childish and wouldn’t do that—especially on someone he barely knows or even if he knows that person, Minhyun wouldn’t do that._

_…right?_

_~_

 

_Well so much for Minhyun not doing that. They just arrived at the cafeteria when he can feel someone glaring at his back. Dongho who was just in front of him, gushing on the food a few seconds ago was now hiding at his side holding onto his arm like a damsel in distress._

_He takes Dongho’s tray and holds his hand and quickly looks where Dongho told him where the scary-glaring guy is seating—only to come face to face with a glaring Minhyun—who quickly averted his eyes and started picking on his food. Daniel then started laughing like crazy—amused, as he was watching everything unfold, surprising the innocent students on the table next to them._

_He meets Ong’s eyes then, smugly smirking at him, telling him ‘I told you so’._

_“Dongho…are you sure that the scary guy…who always glares at you…is the one sitting with Daniel and Ong?” he asks the other_

_“Y-yeah…Th-that’s him.” Dongho answers in a hushed voice too afraid that he might be heard._

_“That’s Minhyun...” He tells him. Shaking his head, baffled by his best friend’s actions._

_“Your best friend?” Dongho says taken aback too._

_“Yeah…my stupid big headed best friend.” He says as he looks at Minhyun whose busy glaring at the still laughing OngNiel._

_“Oh… OH—that makes sense.” Dongho says chuckling. He looks at the other confused. “What makes sense?” He asks him._

_“I’m sure you already know Jonghyun.” Dongho tells him taking his tray from his hand. “Let’s eat. I’m starving.” Dongho says pulling his hand as they line up “Yeah sure. Let’s go.”_

_He looks back at his friends’ table,_

_And this time he meets his best friend's eyes._

_They stare at each other before Minhyun looks away again—face turning pink._

 

_Are you actually jealous Hwang Minhyun?_

 

“Remember that time where we got grounded for cutting classes? And how you got grounded again because of sneaking out? I would tell you that I’m sorry for getting you in trouble, but I was thankful that you actually sneaked out—thank you for that night, Minhyun, that’s one of my most favorite nights with you.”

 

_“You’re grounded for a week Jonghyun. No video games, no toys and that includes your Pokemon cards, no going outside—you can’t go to Minhyun’s place either—he’s grounded too.”_

_That’s what his mother said 6 days ago—6 days of hell without his video games to play with, his beloved toys and his precious PokeCards that he plays with when Minhyun’s busy studying, and his Minhyun who he misses so much (even though they would still see each other at school)._

_He plops on his bed, clutching Bugi on his chest (he calls him Bugi when his dada is not around)_

_“Bugi ya~ I miss your dada so much. It’s a Saturday and we can’t even see his Bighead today…” he says whining at their son. Bugi stretches his neck—a sign telling him that he couldn’t agree more._ _“Should we come up with a plan to see Dada tonight?” He asks the other. “Hmmm…what do you think we should do? Your dada wouldn’t just give in easily though?” Bugi shakes his neck sideways._

_“What should—” he hears his sister singing loudly downstairs. Ugh. She’s at it again. “I’ll be right back Bugi, I’ll just steal her mic so that she won’t torment us.” He says putting their son on the bed as he runs down the stairs_

 

_“No! No! No!” He says taking the mic from his sister_

_“Let me have some fun Jonghyunnie.” Kahi says taking back the mic from his hand. He groans. “Just 1 song okay?” He says as he lowers the volume._

_“2.” Kahi says as she picks through the song list._

_“1. Just one please” he says. “Nope. 2.” Kahi says stubbornly._

_“Papa!!! Kahi noona is singing again!!”_

_“Let your sister sing Jonghyun—that’s how she relieves her stress.” Their dad says laughing at them as he takes a bite of—we have cake??? He quickly goes to his father and steals the fork as he sits on his lap. His father pats his head and pulls him closer so that he won’t fall._

_“It’s been a long time since I saw you two like this.” Their momma says—smiling lovingly at them._

_“I know—Jonghyun grew up too fast and rejects my cuddles already.” Papa says wiping the cake of his face._ _“Because I’m not a baby anymore.” He says with his mouth full of cake._

 _“_ _I know, but you’ll always be our baby, you and sister will always be—even when you become adults.” papa says pinching his nose. “That hurts!!”_

 _“Well that’s nothing compared to the torture of listening to your sister’s singing.” Papa says making him and mama laugh as Kahi glares at them._ _He couldn’t agree more as Kahi starts belting out a Taylor Swift song._

_Oh. OHHHHHH. That—that’s actually a good idea._

_Now, what time should he do it?_

_~_

 

_It was 10 in the evening when he’s sure that both of their parents are finally sleeping that he decided to put his plan to into action. He takes their son, his sketchpad **,** a pen, and some pebbles to throw at Minhyun’s window._

 

**_Stage 1. Throw the pebbles._ **

_He thought throwing the pebbles at Minhyun’s window will be easy but he was wrong—it’s actually hard because the gap between their houses isn’t actually that short that he had to throw 11 pebbles constantly and by his 12th try it finally hit Minhyun’s window—but receives no reaction from the other._

_So he tries again—still nothing. And again—a little bit harder (and a bigger pebble) there—he sees Minhyun turning on his lamp and watches him walk towards the window—surprise and confusion all over his face._

 

**_Step 2: Charm your way into Minhyun._ **

_He puts on his innocent eyes and smiles his very cute innocent smile at Minhyun—who is now gulping—already falling into his charms. Good._

_“Mwinnie~” he calls him in his very cute innocent voice. Minhyun blushes. He looks at Bugi, winks at him—telling him that their plan is going smoothly._

_Now on for the last step._

 

**_Step 3:  Lure him to sneak out_ **

_He takes his sketchpad and opens it to the first page, showing Minhyun a drawing of him and their son captioned with “We miss you T_T”_

_Minhyun chuckles and nods, mouthing an “I missed you too.”_

_This time it’s his turn to blush—he can feel weird things happening on his body, his tummy—as if there’s a hundred butterflies there, flapping their beautiful wings in excitement, his heart, beating loud and so fast yet not so fast but…as if… he looks at Minhyun whose eyes turned crescents—smiling brightly… like the beautiful moon… that he wants to badly jump his way over him and hug him tight…and… “Jju!!” Minhyun calls him—waking him up from his thoughts. He gulps._

_Get yourself together Jonghyun—stick to the plan._

_He smiles at the other and shows him the next page “I miss your cuddles Mwinnie”_

_Minhyun laughs and reaches for his sketchpad and pen, answering him “I missed yours too.”_

_He turns to the next and hopefully this works well—as this is the deciding factor._ _“Sleep with me tonight?” Minhyun looks at the sketchpad then at him—face suddenly blank, understanding what he is planning._  

_So he uses his hidden card—he leans on his window, hands on his cheeks, batting his angelic eyes at the other, with his signature pout “Pwease?”_

_Minhyun looks bedazzled so he strikes while the pot is still hot “Jjuya is cold, I need Mwinnie’s warm cuddles.” He says with his most angelic and cute voice that he can._

_“How?” Minhyun asks him. HA!!!!!!!!! He wants to jump and yell a woohoo~~ but not yet—not yet, keep calm Jonghyun._

_He tries to hide the satisfaction on his face as he shows him the next page “Sneak out.”_

_Minhyun shakes his head—he saw this coming—so he uses his hidden hidden card—that he knows will seal the deal._

_He leans on the window again—channeling his sad-baby-cute-voice (that always worked wonders for him)_ _“Mwinnie…” he starts sadly, eyes glistening with his fake tears—he sniffs and pouts—this time it’s his sad pout._ _“You wouldn’t give Jjuya cuddles??” Minhyun gulps “You pwomised to always give me cuddles…” he looks down and sniffs. He looks at Minhyun slowly—using his sad puppy eyes—letting it get to him._

_Minhyun exhales and stares at him “Fine. Open the door for me in 5.”_

_He smiles sweetly at him “Thank you Mwinnie~~”_

_He waits til Minhyun left his room_

_And jumps in joy._

_Throwing their son in the air in celebration._

 

**_Minhyun’s cuddles: Mission accomplished._ **

_He can feel Minhyun’s soft mechanical laughter vibrating as he snuggles on his chest—enjoying the warmth embrace of the other._

_Minhyun lightens his hold and looks down on him._ _“Are you that happy Jju?” the other asks teasing him. He snuggles deeper on his chest hugging him tight and hums. Minhyun chuckles and hugs him tight as he starts singing his lullaby._

_~_

_“Ya Jonghyun, Minhyun is—of course he’s here.” Kahi says shaking her head as she looks at her brother and his best friend sleeping peacefully in each other’s arm._

_“Mum!!! I found Minhyun!!!”_

 

“How you make me feel like I’m in cloud nine when you say my name and look at me.”

 

_“Jonghyun.”_

_He hears Minhyun’s voice calling him._

_He looks for him amongst the crowd of their batch mates._

_Some already started crying and hugging each other—they haven’t even started the ceremony yet._

_Others are laughing and teasing as they recall memories of their high school years._

_And some—well not some, just Ong Seongwu (his favorite—don’t tell him though) busy taking a selca in their graduation gown, with an irritated Daniel and Dongho at each side (probably got tired of taking too many selcas)_

 

_“Jonghyun.”_

_He hears him call him again._

_Where the hell is he? He looks around again, standing on his toes looking for his big headed best friend._

_Usually it would be easy to find him, aside from his big head, it’s easy to spot Hwang Minhyun—just look for a certain person who’s shining radiantly as if there’s a spotlight over him—then you’ll see him. But since there’s a ton of lighting in the theatre, he’s having a hard time locating his Radiant Moon, Hwang Minhyun._

 

_“Jonghyun.”_

_He turns and meets his eyes._

_Looking straight at him. Smiling radiantly like the moon that he’d always been. They stay like that just looking at each other—as if they’re in a world of their own._

_… Getting intoxicated by Minhyun gaze as he feels him pulling him towards him—drowning him with exhilaration, yearning, affection and desire…_

_Wait. What? He shakes his head. No. Hell—No. Fucking NO. He shakes his head continuously as he looks down—feeling something go hard somewhere within him._

 

_“Are you fucking serious?”_

_“Who’s fucking serious?” Minhyun asks him curiously. He shakes his head still looking down not wanting to say anything as he calms his mind and tries his best to turn it to its normal state. Minhyun pulls his chin up—locking their eyes._

_He looks at his mesmerizing beautiful eyes, then to his perfectly pointed nose, and looks down to those pink kissable lips. He gulps._

_Fuck._

_“I need to go the restroom.” He says pushing Minhyun’s hands off him, leaving a dumbfounded Minhyun behind._

 

 

“I…..” he scratches his neck—embarrassed of his thoughts as he remembers that too vividly and what he had to do that day. He clears his throat “...Anyway, enough of that… Let’s talk about the others, I’m sure you’re curious on how they’re doing and they’re doing just fine…”

He tells him shaking his head to get it all together—he shouldn’t have drink beer before this talk. Think of pure things Jonghyun, think of your friends and how crazy they are. He clears his throat again.

“...Minki’s having the time of his life enjoying the confines of our apartment.” he laughs as remembers how Minki (Minhyun’s childhood friend from Busan) suddenly showed up during his shift and told him that he’ll be moving in to their apartment and asked him for the passcode.

 

 _“Excuse me?” he says after coughing out the coffee that he was enjoying—taken aback by Minki’s all too sudden announcement. Minki rolls his eyes at and groans—annoyed that he has to repeat what he said again for the 3_ _ rd _ _time._

_“Give me the keys, passcode, whatevs—so I could start moving in.”_

_“Where are you moving in??”_

_“In your apartment where else?!”_

_“WHY????” he asks confounded_

_“Because someone has to live there and keep it inhabited while you live here.”_

_“I go there from time to time Minki.” He reasons, even though he’s sure that’s it’s a lost cause already._

_“Yeah, ‘time to time’ like once every quarter.” Minki rolls his eyes “Sujin noona and I went there two days ago to get some things for Bighead, and we didn’t expect to be welcomed by a hundred dust bunnies that we ended up cleaning the whole house, which—by the way ruined our beautiful outfits!”_

_He can feel himself shrinking—he already reminded himself countless times and even put it on his schedule to drop by and clean their apartment, but he always ends up postponing it once he’s in the confines of their room._

_He sighs. Will it be okay for Minhyun if Minki moves in with them? He starts thinking… He doesn’t know if Minki is the neat and organize-type, since they didn’t share a place before and all he knows about the guy from hearing stories about him from Minhyun and from finally meeting him in the flesh (and abrupt visits like this) is that the guy is a model, kinda crazy, but has a sweet and pure heart—though he usually ruins it with his sassy mouth._

_“I promise to keep everything clean and organized, I’m better than you at that anyway.” Minki tells him eyeing his disheveled hair. He tries his best to tame it and gives up._

_He drinks his coffee channeling what Minhyun would do in this situation—will the love of his life agree or disagree with Minki’s moving in proposal?_

_“Fine—I’ll pay ¾ of the rent.”_

_“Passcode is 0315.” He immediately hands his keys and stands—just in case Minki changes his mind. He hears the other mumble an ‘Of course he’ll agree to that.’_

 

“OngNiel are still together and going strong—aside from their usual fights. They just moved into their new apartment, their place is beautiful—but I’m sure ours would be better when you’re back.” He says teasingly, knowing Minhyun’s competitive side wouldn’t let that slide.

“Dongho’s doing great—still a dummy—but he’s one of the ‘sought after producers’ now…he also uses his nickname Baekho—so sometimes he doesn’t notice us calling him…” he chuckles “I’m sure you’re so proud of him.” he tells him lovingly as he imagines Minhyun teasing Dongho of how a big shot he is now—and at the same time proud of their friend for achieving his dreams.

“Aron hyung’s back in town too, he got tired of the burgers in LA I guess—” he remembers getting a call from Aron after his shift, asking him to pick him up from the airport. The car ride was filled with their makhyung whining how hard and lonely he was there as an intern journalist, how he misses the authentic taste of Kimchi so much, and how he won’t be going back there even if they beg him to. Which made him roll his eyes (a lot of times) because c'mon, that’s nothing compared to handling different emergency cases but felt touched when Aron told him that ‘complaints aside, I don’t think I can survive another year without you guys’’. He also remembers the tear-jerking reunion (not really—he felt like throwing up) of the couple. “—and is probably clinging to Sujin noona right now.”

“Everyone’s doing great…living most of their lives… and missing you so much…I’m sure you already know that.” he says brushing the hair off his face.

He remembers walking on a crying Seongwu, Daniel, and Dongho (that almost gave him a heart attack—Seongwu’s fault) a week ago.

 

 

_“Why are you still here Jonghyun?” his Chief asks him as he reads through the case studies he compiled and made for Post-Traumatic Coma cases_

_“Just finishing this up chief…” he says not even glancing at the other who’s looking at him with worry._

_“You’ve been on shift for 26 hours straight Jonghyun—” He nods still busy reading and finding errors “—I didn’t kicked you out of the ER so you could do this. Go upstairs to your boo and REST—please I BEG YOU.” His chief says switching off his monitor._

_He looks at his chief—annoyed and—“Oh no—don’t you dare do that pout on me you brat!” he turns his monitor back on “Kim Jonghyun!!” His chief snarls at him_

_“Someone has to save this you know chief, it doesn’t save on its own.” He teases the oldie. He logs out and switches it off. Putting his notes and Nintendo switch (that helped him stay awake) on his messenger bag._

_“Now go upstairs and rest Jonghyun—no coming down here til I said so.” His chief tells him shooing him away._

_“You’re a meanie!!” he teasingly yells at the door sticking his tongue out before running off._ _He hears the Chief’s booming laughter echo along the hallway. He’s lucky to have an amazing chief—who’s like a 3_ _rd_ _father (Dada Hwang is 2_ _nd_ _) to him and also treats him like a son._

_Thank you for always looking out for me Soogeun hyung. He says as he goes up their floor._

_~_

_He sees Jinyoung holding something—looking panicky entering their room leaving the door ajar._ _He can hear noises coming out of it—someone sobbing—really loud—it can’t be right?? Someone would’ve called him if something happened_

_He starts walking faster—panic all over his face—as he repeat ‘he’s fine, Minhyun’s fine’ over and over like a mantra._

_And he’s right as he sees Seongwu crying—holding onto Minhyun’s hand as he does his monologue of how much he misses their asshat of a friend._ _Daniel—eyes still red—smiling at Minhyun… brushing his beloved’s hair with his fingers... a_ _nd Dongho who’s unusually quiet—sniffing on the other side—gently wiping Minhyun’s hand with a towel_

_He almost had a heart attack._

_He breathes out loudly—startling Jinyoung._ _“Hyung…” Jinyoung says surprised to see him. He shakes his head and waves for him to come out—not wanting to interrupt their friends._

_“What took you so long hyung? Weren’t you kicked out of the ER hours ago?” Jinyoung says eyeing him suspiciously “Relax—I was just at the office.” He says taking a seat at the bench._

_“What happened? Why are they crying again?” he asks—it’s not something new that one of their friends would cry when visiting—usually it’s Ong or Minki—but the Kang’s? Something’s off._

_“Minhyun hyung…I think he can hear us…” Jinyoung says in a hushed voice—like he’s talking about a ghost. He chuckles and tousles the young nurse’s hair. “Of course he can hear us Jinyoung.”_

_“No hyung, FOR REAL—Seongwu hyung was doing his usual dramatic monologues—and then he started talking about you…how you ‘turned over a new leaf’ and how if hyung’s awake and could see you—he’ll be so proud and crying… Daniel hyung then suddenly shrieked and said that Minhyun hyung’s hand moved in his and we’re like ‘Yeah sure’—” Jinyoung pauses, catching his breath._ _“—then Dongho hyung suddenly screamed and said that Daniel’s right and hyung’s hand moved in his too… the hyungs’ started bawling then… and I just kept looking at Minhyun hyung… and I swear I saw his eyes crinkle—like he’s about to cry?_ _And then he did!! He actually did hyung!! We saw him shed tears—real tears hyung!!” Jinyoung says looking at him in the eyes, shaking his shoulders—awestruck at Minhyun’s actions like he witnessed a miracle._

_Well he did actually witnessed one, as Minhyun never once did that—no matter how much someone cried and talk to him before._

_“Did you call Doctor Jung?” he asks as he takes out his phone looking for the Doctor’s number._

_“Yeah, I called him earlier. He already came by and checked on hyung… he told me to tell you to call him—” found it! He quickly calls him not even waiting for Jinyoung to finish_ _“—after you had your sleep! Hyung!! Dr. Jung will kill me!” Jinyoung whines as he tries to take his phone he shrugs the other off and stands_

_“I see that Jinyoung failed to tell you that you should only call me after you had your rest.” Doctor Jung greets him._

_“Hi Doc! Have you eaten?” he says hoping the doctor would fall for his bait._ _“No, and no—I’m not falling over that. I’ll talk to you tomorrow Jonghyun, goodnight.”_ _The doctor says dropping the call._

_He calls him again “Hyung~~Jonghyunnie wants to have dinner with you~~” he greets him cutely this time. The doctor replies “SLEEP” and hangs up. He calls him again but gets rejected right away._

_What an a—he receives a text from the Doctor:_

**_Doctor Jung_ **

 

**_He’s doing really well,_ **

**_And we can definitely say that he’s aware and reacting to what’s going on around him._ **

**_Hopefully if this continues—he’ll wake up sooner rather later._ **

**_Now sleep Jonghyun—please._ **

**_I don’t want to deal with your chief telling me on how I didn’t let his favorite-hardworking resident not get his needed rest—again._ **

**_Goodnight._ **

 

_He hugs Jinyoung—surprising him—as he feels ecstatic about Minhyun’s progress._

_That finally Minhyun’s showing signs that he’s here. Really here._

_And that he knows that they’re here for him—patiently waiting til he’s back._

_“Take your break now Jinyoung, I’ll take over now.” He says pushing the other to go the sleeping quarters “but hyung, you haven’t slept yet—” Jinyoung interrupts him_

_“I’m off tomorrow, so I’ll be alright, just make sure to drop by tomorrow morning okay? I’ll probably be asleep and hibernating by then.” Jinyoung chuckles knowing how he is when he’s hibernating—he’s exactly the same as Minhyun—the only difference is he keeps on hugging Minhyun in his sleep that Dr. Jung and Jinyoung would usually have a hard time pulling them apart._

_“Okay hyung, I’ll bring your lunch too, your mother left a bunch of food for us earlier.”_

_“Thanks Jinyoung.” He says, waving him goodbye as he walks to their room._

_“Hello Asshats, your captain has arrived.” He says beaming at the trio. Their eyes still red from the crying earlier. Dongho and Daniel smile at him and Seongwu… well let’s just say he’s being ‘Seongwu’_

_“Jjuya…” Seongwu runs to him crying (again) dramatically (as usual) hugging him tight like they haven’t seen each other for years (when they see each other every week and even more)._ _“Minhyunnie… Minhyunnie moved… he cried Jonghyunnie… he cried…. he—he can hear us...” Seongwu says in between sniffs, embracing him tightly, drenching his coat with tears and...Mucus._

_Hopefully it doesn’t stain his precious pristin white coat—it’s a gift from Sujin after all._

_“I heard…Jinyoung told me…” he says patting the other._

_Daniel pulls the crying Seongwu off of him and takes his place instead making Seongwu whine a ‘No fair—I was here first’_

_“He’ll be back soon Jong… he’s really gonna be back soon… right?” Daniel asks him—looking at him straight in the eye—that he can see the excitement, hope, longing and at the same time worry in his eyes—that…No. Minhyun will be back soon—he will._

_“He will Niel, he’ll be back with us soon—so you better get your ears ready to hear his constant nagging again.” Daniel nods and cries—he hugs him tightly._ _“He’ll be back soon Niel… don’t worry… he’ll be back… Minhyun doesn’t break his promises…” he tells him—assuring him of what they’re all afraid of. He can feel Niel nodding in his shoulder._

_He sees Dongho making his way to him “I guess it’s your turn now princess?” He asks—welcoming him with his other arm—and sure enough the princess embraces him—crying too._

_“You’ve worked hard Jonghyun-ah… you’ve worked hard…” Dongho tells him—making him emotional._

_“You’ll see him soon Jonghyun… he’ll be with you soon…” Seongwu tells him—hugging him from the back._

_“Don’t forget to use protection…” Daniel says making them laugh._

_He takes a glance at Minhyun and he knows that the other is happily listening to them—probably laughing at them for being mushy and if he can see them he would probably nag them for looking so unkempt—their eyes are all red from the crying, their noses pink and runny, clothes all wrinkled, coated with tears and mucus._

_See? We’re all here waiting for you,_

_So come back soon my love._

_Come back soon._

 

 

“Everyone misses you so much Min… everyone… misses you and longs to see you back…”

“I missed you too, you fucking asshat… I miss you so so much… that it hurts… if I… If I knew before… I wouldn’t push you away… I wouldn’t… even dare to do that… I’m sorry Minhyun… I’m sorry for hurting you that night…. I’m sorry…” he tells him crying

 

 

_“The night sky...it’s beautiful, isn’t it?” He tells Minhyun. He doesn’t look at the other as he knows that Minhyun is already breaking apart… hurting because of him—because his best friend is in love with an asshole… a bastard… a fucking coward who doesn’t deserve to be loved… especially by Hwang Minhyun._

_So what does the asshole Kim Jonghyun do?_

_Simple: he pushes him away. Like the asshole that he is._

_“You’re always like the moon to me Minhyun, always so bright, so big, and so far away—that even if I try to reach for it and do my best to stay next to you like those stars—I can’t. Because you’re far too great, far too amazing—for a petty star, like me.” He tells him smiling as if seeing the hurt in Minhyun’s face doesn’t bother him at all._

_As if hurting Minhyun isn’t breaking him apart…_

_As if…_

_“Jonghyun—” He feels his walls crumbling… Minhyun don’t… please… I can’t…_ _He shakes his head… stopping him from saying anything more… stopping him to call his name… begging him… Because he can’t… He can’t give in…_

 _“I’ve always feel the same way about you Minhyun… but I’m sorry, I can’t be with you.”_ _He tells him. He grips hard on the railing until his knuckles turn white… holding tighter…_

  _To keep him from reaching out and giving in..._

_“Why?” Minhyun asks him. His voice shaking._

_He looks at him, tears streaming down his cheeks_

_His Minhyun is crying._

_He feels like he’s breaking apart…_

 

_He touches his face…_

_Wiping the tears in his face…_

_Wishing that he can be with him…_

_That he’ll be that someone who can stand next to him…_

_But he’s not… and never will be…_

_Because he’s Kim Jonghyun._

 

_“Because you deserve someone better.”_

 

_Someone who’s not me…_

_Someone who won’t pull you down…_

_Someone you don’t need to take care of…_

_But someone who’ll take care of you instead..._

 

_“You just don’t want to be with me...” Minhyun tells him… destroying the last bit of the walls within him… leaning into his hand… he can feel the warmth of Minhyun’s face… his warm tears trickling through his hand and onto his arm…_

_“I’ve always wanted to be with you.” He whispers._ _Honestly… vulnerably… showing him the real him… the real Jonghyun behind the smiles and his brat attitude… the real him that he always hid underneath…_

 

_He sees pain across Minhyun face…_

_His tears streaming more and more as he understands…_

_As they both crumble and break apart..._

 

_“Let me be selfless for once Min, okay?” He tells him… Minhyun closes his eyes and nods…_

 

_He pulls Minhyun towards him…_

_Hugging him tight…_

_And kisses him…_

 

“I’m sorry Minhyun… I’m sorry… please come back… please… please… I beg you...” he tells him over and over again

 

_“Jonghyun...”_

He hears a raspy voice call his name.

Warm hands gently touching his hair

 

_“I’m back Jonghyun… you waited long didn’t you?”_

He can feel someone pulling his hand

Holding it tight

 

_“I’m... so proud of… you…”_

He hears the raspy voice pausing

As if he’s catching his breath

 

_“I always knew… that you’ll be a great doctor…_

_You are Kim Jonghyun after all...”_

The voice tells him

Brushing the hair off his face

 

 _“...and thank you… for patiently… waiting for me…_ _You’ve worked hard Jonghyun-ah… thank you…”_

The raspy voice whispers

Leaving a kiss on his forehead

 

He wakes up with the feeling that someone’s stroking his cheeks. He opens his eyes slowly—surprised to see Mama Hwang—who’s looking at him with worry. “Mum?” He croaks. Mama Hwang smiles at him—tousling his hair as always.

“You fell asleep in your thinking chair again Jonghyun.” Mama Hwang tells him in disapproval as she goes to the table, getting a glass of water and hands it to him.

“Thanks mum.” He says drinking. He looks at his other hand and realizes that Minhyun’s holding his hand rather than the other way around. “Mum? What time did you arrive?” He asks the other. “Just now dear… why?” Minhyun’s mother answers as she prepares their food.

He looks at their hands again, slowly moving his hand under Minhyun’s—studying it.

“Is everything okay Jonghyun?” Mama Hwang asks him. “Yeah mum… just… still not out of it… I guess...” Did he put it over his last night? Why would he even do that though?

“This is why we kept telling you not to overwork yourself too much… I heard you were kicked out from the ER a day earlier but you stayed there for another day yet again, your body needs to rest Jonghyun, you can’t keep doing this or your body will give up on you.”

And his daily dose of Mama Hwang’s nagging is here. He used to wonder where Minhyun got his nagging trait from back when they’re still in school, since he seldom hears Minhyun’s parents nag or reprimand them. Guess he was just not there to hear it—as he now hears it from time to time (especially when he doesn’t go home from his usual 12 hour shift and extends it to a 20 or more instead)

“I know mum…” He answers as he slowly moves the chair—careful not to make a noise and wake Minhyun up (as if he would be woken up by that—he tried before) and stands, stretching his back—who suffered all night crouching.

 He kisses Minhyun’s forehead and greets him a good morning and walks over to Mama Hwang who’s still busy preparing their breakfast.

 “Good morning mum~” He greets her with a back hug and a kiss on the temple.

“I’m not kidding when I said you shouldn’t over work yourself Jonghyun. You’re 27 now, you should take care of your health more.” Mama Hwang says passing her the dishes to put on the table.

“I will mum, don’t worry.” He assures her.

“I don’t want to have a weak-wobbly-son-in-law Jonghyun, I want you healthy and strong, so you and Minhyun could raise our future grandchildren well.” Mama Hwang states as she takes a seat across from him

“Sujin’s pregnant and having twins??” He asks shocked—he only saw Sujin last week and he’s sure that she isn’t? Well she’s wearing an oversized shirt too so maybe?

“I’m talking about you and Minhyun’s future children Jonghyun.” Mama Hwang says as she puts the tail of a grilled eel on his bowl of rice.

 

_Wow very subtle Mama Hwang._

 

He looks at his sleeping _‘husband’_ —the _‘soon-to-be-father’_ of their _‘future children’_ —wow not even a _child_ —but Mama Hwang really has to use the plural form— _unbelievable_. He shakes his head trying to get rid of imagining how he and Minhyun would create the impossible _‘children’_ of theirs

“Mum… uh… not to burst this…bubble of… yours...” he says flapping his free hand in the air. Minhyun’s mum looks at him—amused— _too amused_ for his liking. “You do know… that we can’t do that right? I mean we can—” Ofcourse they can—not just the procreate part—Wait—Why was he even explaining this?!

Mama Hwang bursts into laughter understanding what he’s saying “okay—we’re not talking about this anymore.” He says and starts eating instead

“When that happens, please be gentle with him my dear, our Minhyunnie is still so fragile…so handle with care and use—”

“Mum please we’re having breakfast.” Mama Hwang chuckles at him mischievously—just like how her son is—making his face turn red like those tomatoes that he hates so much.

“I’m just saying—you’re lucky we’re having this talk, if it’s—”

“Yes mum—thank you so much. Now please let’s eat in _peace_.” He answers shaking his head shaking his not so pure thoughts away as his imagination started going wild—imagining him and Minhyun—

“Hyung!” Daehwi calls him opening the door. He should be thankful for the interruption of his intern but can’t he just enjoy his breakfast in peace? He glares a _‘what now’_ at the other. Daehwi enters their room, Jinyoung following behind him, apologetically smiling at him and Mama Hwang for the interruption. He nods as he watches Jinyoung check on his _husband_ (wait—what?)

“Oh sorry for ruining your mother and son talk, but the Chief is calling for you… it’s about the—” he shakes his head—stopping him to tell the patient’s details and stands earning a glare from his _mother-in-law_ (wow Jonghyun—you really get that in over your head) that he should sit and finish his breakfast first “—the patient… last night.” Daehwi tells him

“Did something happen?” He asks, excusing himself earning a grunt of disapproval from his mother-in-law

“I…don’t know... the Chief just called me to tell you to go down…” Daehwi says looking down. That’s weird… the Chief would usually notify him and call him—or if he can’t he would tell Daehwi the complete details—and not like this, leaving things hanging “Head down first, I’ll just get ready” he says as heads to the bathroom.

 

He finishes within 5 mins—his shower skills that his _husband, Minhyun_ always disapproves of—comes in handy for times like this.

 

Mama Hwang’s now sitting on the bed beside Minhyun, brushing his hair as Jinyoung checks his monitor at the other side.

“Anything new?” He asks as he tries his best to fix his tie. Mama Hwang then slaps his hand away—and fixes it for him. “Nothing hyung”

 “I’ll be back soon mum, love you.” He says, as he kisses her on her cheeks—thanking her for the meal (and the talk).

 “You better, you still haven’t rested enough Jonghyun. If this continues even if we feed you a hundred eels, it wouldn’t work on you.”

“Mum please...” he begs. He hears Jinyoung laughing—Minhyun’s probably laughing too right now in his mind—at least.

 “You’re enjoying this, aren’t you?” He teasingly asks him. “I’ll be back soon my love, be nice and don’t smile at Jinyoung while I’m away.” He says kissing him on the forehead.

 He heads for the door—worrying and praying that hopefully everything’s okay with the patient that came in yesterday.

He hears a faint raspy voice chuckling as soon as he closes the door and someone shushing—which sounds eerily familiar… He’s about to go back in when he feels his phone vibrate.

“I’m on my way down Daehwi-yah.”

~

The meeting with other surgeons about the multi trauma patient that came in the ER yesterday just ended. The surgery that the boy had to go through for 7 hours are all successful—and is now recovering in the ICU.

Now all they have to do is wait.

Patiently wait for him to wake up and not end up in a coma just like what happened to Minhyun.

 

He excuses himself and stands

“Where are you going?” The Chief asks him

“Gonna do my rounds, what else?” He answers as he gathers his notes and pen.

“Aren’t you going up? It’s still your off after all.”

He shrugs “I’ve already taken my shower and I’m down here—I should be a doctor and do my duties, or my early shower will be in vain.” He answers

“Yeah—let’s not put that 5 minute shower of yours in vain.” The chief sarcastically tells him as he calls someone and shooing him away.

~

He finished doing his rounds, finished his charts, reports and even updating his case study, and now he’s back at the ER—his third home.

Which is eerily quiet and calm, as if it’s waiting for a storm to come by and wreak havoc on them. Which makes him feel agitated—as if he’s walking on a thin line, waiting for it to snap. He shakes his negative thoughts away—maybe his mother-in-law’s right—he really needed to rest.

He’s not usually this negative (the thinking chair actually worked on him) especially when he’s at the ER—because they can’t and shouldn’t think like that as doctors whose jobs are to save lives and to support their patients and loved ones—because who would trust a doctor who radiates negativity with their lives right?

Even the past him wouldn’t trust a doctor like that.

Anyway enough of that. He sees his favorite intern.

“Daehwi-yah, if someone looks for me, tell them that I’m at the ICU, and tell the Chief that I already check on the admitted patients, and that he needs to check on Mr. Ahn. I already texted him—but he didn’t answer so remind him again for me, okay?”

“Aren’t you going home hyung?” Daehwi asks him

“I will after this—just need to check on the boy.”

“Okay hyung, don’t take too long, your mother-in-law told me to drag you up if you’re still not done by 4.” He looks at his watch, its only 2:45–he has enough time.

“Still have an hour and 15 minutes, I’ll get going. Don’t forget to tell the Chief okay?” Daehwi nods and takes his phone out, shooing him away too.

Why is everyone on their phones and shooing him away like he’s a stray dog?!

~

He gets welcomed by Jaehwan’s monstrous laughter as soon as he steps in at the ICU. The nurse probably forgot (again) that he’s stationed at the ICU now and kept on laughing loudly as he watches videos on his phone.

“Kim Jaehwan.” He says sternly as he sits next to him, checking on the boy’s progress report at the monitor.

“Hyung, you’re here?” The other asks him cheerfully—pausing whatever show he’s watching. “No, this is just an apparition.” He answers sarcastically as he reads through the report—which is all good. Good.

“Is his family still here?” He asks the other who’s back at watching some variety show. Jaehwan shakes his head “They left an hour ago. Someone’s there though, and since you’re going, please tell the boy that he needs to leave in 20 minutes—he can’t stay too long.” Jaehwan says ordering him.

“Isn’t that your job though?” He asks arms crossed in his chest. “Please hyung.” Jaehwan tells him not even looking at him. “Fine.” He glances at the clock and its 3:05–he has 45 minutes left before he gets dragged by Daehwi.

He stands and goes to the room.

He sees the boy that Jaehwan’s talking about,

Crying and apologizing over and over to the sleeping boy.

Just like him with his sleeping man.

“I’m sorry for being an ass… I shouldn’t have said that and left… I’m sorry for being mean to you… when you’ve… when you were only looking out for me…” the boy says crying and holding onto the other’s hand.

“I’m sorry for always pushing you away… I shouldn’t have done that… hell there’s a lot of things I shouldn’t have done…”

“I’m sorry for being cold… when you’ve only been warm to me… For always staying by my side… for understanding me—even when… even when you should have left me instead…”

“I’m sorry for always saying I’m sorry instead of Thank you… I know—you always told me not to say ‘sorry’ and say ‘thank you’ instead… I really suck at listening, aren’t I?”

“Thank you… I just want to say thank you for everything… so please wake up… please… please… we still have a lot things to do… the plans that you want us to do together… remember that? I promise I’ll do everything with you… I’ll be better… I won’t let the negativity eat me up… I promise I’ll do better… I haven’t even said I love you…”

 

_“I love you… Kim Jonghyun...”_

_He hears the raspy voice say to him taking his hand_

 

_“Always have… always will...”_

_Leaving a warm kiss on his hand_

 

He vividly remembers the voice—Minhyun’s voice talking to him—but… He...It… it can’t be right?

Wasn’t it just a dream?

 

_“I’ll see you later Jonghyun… happy anniversary...”_

_Warm hands gently holding his_

 

He remembers hearing the raspy chuckling voice when he closed the door earlier—he immediately takes his phone out to call Jinyoung—

 

**_“Code Blue, Code Blue 809”_ **

_He drops his phone on the floor_

_Holding onto the handrail as he feels everything around him shaking_

 

**_“Code Blue, Code Blue 809”_ **

_“Hyung!! Jonghyun hyung! Get your shit together!” Jaehwan yells shaking him._

 

**_“Code Blue, Code Blue 809”_ **

_He pushes Jaehwan’s hand away and runs not giving a care to the alarmed eyes that’s looking at him, at the yells of the staff telling him not to run and to stop_

 

**_“Code Blue, Code Blue 809”_ **

_He runs up the stairs_

_Not having the patience to wait for the elevator_

_Not even pausing to catch his breath_

 

**_“Code Blue, Code Blue 809”_ **

_Begging Minhyun to hold on_

_That he can’t give up_

_That they’re all here for him_

_That he’s here_

 

**_“Code Blue, Code Blue 809”_ **

_He reaches their floor and runs._

_Praying over and over again that he isn’t late_

_That Minhyun…_

_His Minhyun_

 

He immediately barges in their room welcomed by static sound of the monitor that’s connected to his Minhyun.

He sees Doctor Jung, Jinyoung, the Chief, and the code team all on the other side—not even attending to Minhyun—not doing anything to save him.

He quickly goes to Minhyun—sitting on top of him—doing chest compressions as he yells for Jinyoung to get the defibrillator

 

“Don’t you fucking die on me Hwang Minhyun. I didn’t wait for 7 years just so you could die.”

“I think we need to stop him—” he hears someone say behind him

“Jonghyun” Someone calls him. He ignores it and focuses on getting his Minhyun back.

“JINYOUNG FUCKING GET THAT THING READY OR I’LL KILL YOU” he yells at the nurse again who didn’t even move an inch and do his orders

“Jonghyun” he hears someone call him again. He ignores it again—because he knows what they’re about to tell him—and no, he’s not letting anyone tell him that.

“Jonghyun—it hurts.” fair white hands holds his wrists—stopping him from saving his Minhyun. He pushes it away and continues—he has to save him—he has to save Minhyun.

“I’ll really die if you continue this.” Minhyun tells him coughing holding his wrists.

 

He stops and looks at the hand on his wrists

The hand slowly pulls his hand up from his chest,

Interlacing it with his.

 

He slowly looks up

Meeting his gaze

His lips curved upward in a smile

His eyes crinkling—smiling at him

 

And it all dawns on him that everything was off from the start. How no one’s seems to be shaken,

How there’s not even an equipment to revive the fucking man that was supposed to be dying.

 

And that fucking ‘Code Blue, Code Blue 809’

Who even announces that dramatically?!

 

He looks behind him and sees Seongwu wearing one of his coats—hiding quickly behind Daniel

He sees their friends who’s also wearing a coat of his—Minus Aron and Minki’s who’s wearing a nurse uniform—courtesy of Jinyoung of course.

The fucking Code team.

 

He looks back at Minhyun and meets his fox-like eyes—that he missed so much—smiling coyly at him. “You fucking assh—” he can feel hands pulling him off from Minhyun, pulling him off the bed—saving the bastard before he kills him.

Minhyun chuckles and sits up—Doctor Jung and Jinyoung immediately goes to his side—assisting him as they check up on him as  Dongho and Daniel hold him in place.

“Are you feeling okay Minhyun?” Doctor Jung asks the bast—“Yes… though it hurts a bit—I think Doctor Kim is good at chest compressions…”

“Oh he is! He’s the best in our team when it comes to reviving…” he glares at the Chief. “He’s rude to his seniors though.” The Chief adds

“Guess some things didn’t change at all huh Jonghyunnie? Still as bratty as always...” he snarls at Minhyun

“There there~~ calm down Jjuya~~” Seongwu coos at him—patting his hair like he’s a dog

“See… this is why we told you that it’s a bad idea…” Daniel mumbles as he tries his best to keep him in place. “We didn’t agree to this Jonghyun, just so you know.” Dongho adds but not releasing him.

“You bastards.” He says glaring at all of them.

He looks at Minhyun—not even a tinge of remorse for his little prank—busy laughing and enjoying the time of his life—like he wasn’t even gone in the first place.

 

His Minhyun is back.

Conscious.

And smiling at him.

 

“Welcome home Jjuya.”

Minhyun says warmly, full of adoration and love,

Smiling proudly at him as he welcomes him _**home**._


	6. Epilogue

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Henlo~~ I edited some parts but no major editing and just added some parts that I didn't realize was missing HAHAHAHAHAHA MIANHEEEEEE. T_T

**“YA, CAN’T YOU FUCKING GET IT RIGHT?!** ” The Chief yells at him **“YOU’VE BEEN DOING THAT FOR THE LAST HOUR!! IF THIS IS A REAL SITUATION THE PATIENT WOULD ALREADY BE DEAD BY NOW!!!”**

Normally he would just apologize for his inadequate skills, but today—just like some days, the Chief is being unreasonable and an ass at him—again.

**“IF YOU AREN’T FUCKING YELLING AT ME EVERY OTHER MINUTE—THEN I WOULD PROBABLY BE DONE BY NOW!!!”** He bites back

**“DID YOU JUST YELL AT ME?!”** The newly appointed Chief yells back—the veins on his neck showing, a bead of sweat slowly falling onto his sharp chiseled jaw—which makes him look even hotter...he gulps—FOCUS HWANG MINHYUN—THIS IS NOT THE TIME TO SPAZZ ON HOW HOT AND ENTICING YOUR CHIEF IS.  **“YES I DID!!! NOW PLEASE LEAVE ME ALONE SO I COULD FINISH IN PEACE!!!”**

**“YOU—”** The doors of the OR open interrupting their tyrant Chief. “Leave the intern alone hyung, he’s doing his best.” He sees the Chief about to argue back to Daehwi but the other just shushes him off “Also, I’m here to tell you _again_ that your mother and mother-in-law are still waiting for you in your office—or do you want me to drag you out just like before?” The Chief shakes his head. “Good, now shoo~” Daehwi says shooing him away.

“You better not go easy on them Daehwi-ya, especially that foxy intern.” The Chief says pointing at him—which is just rude—that he can’t help but glare at the other.

**“ARE YOU GLARING AT ME?!”**

**“WELL IF YOU AREN'T SO—”**

**“ENOUGH!!! NO COUPLE FIGHT IN THE OR PLEASE—JEBAAAAAAAAAL!!!”** Daehwi yells at the both of them—losing his patience—making Jonghyun turn pink in embarrassment.

Jonghyun turns and retrieves his things—getting ready to leave, mumbling to himself (which is for them to hear) _“what’s the use of being a Chief when a **fellow** and an **intern** just keeps yelling at you—they don’t even respect seniority now—in my time I can’t even look at my seniors in the eyes or I’ll be reprimanded…”_ He and Daehwi roll their eyes while Hyunbin just nods—too scared to contradict the tyrant Chief. “ _All those days without sleep—studying and treating patients…the things I have to sacrifice to get to this position… just to be treated this way…”_

He sighs loudly and looks at his whining husband—yes, _husband—_ they finally got married after he graduated med school (and after a lot of discussions and arguments)

Jonghyun was so adamant that they get married after a year of them being _official_ —that he had to beg him so many times to just wait.

 

_“Why can’t we just get married now?!” Jonghyun tells him in his tantrum mode._

_“Just be patient Jju okay? I just graduated college and I still have to go through med—” He hears a loud huff—he looks at Jonghyun—and uh-oh—the love of his life is gonna explode—like right now_

_“ARE YOU KIDDING ME?! I HAVE TO WAIT 4 MORE YEARS MINHYUN?! 4 MORE YEARS?!! WAS 7 YEARS OF WAITING FOR YOU TO WAKE UP AND ANOTHER 3 YEARS BECAUSE YOU ‘WANT TO FOCUS ON YOUR STUDIES’ NOT PATIENT ENOUGH FOR YOU?!” He sees Minki peeking from his room (why is he still here in their apartment anyway?!)_

_He sighs and closes his book—pulling Jonghyun next to him._ _“Jonghyun-ah…” the other just puffs and pouts—adorable as always._ _“My Jonghyunnie…” he pulls him closer, caressing his face—Jonghyun sighs and leans into his hand._

_“I’m sorry Min… I didn’t mean to yell at you…” Jonghyun says apologetically._

_“I know…” he brushes the hair of his face “I’m always thankful for you… for always understanding me… for always being patient with me…”_

_“But—” Jonghyun says interrupting him, knowing what he’s gonna say next._

_“But—” they both laugh “please be more patient love… This time, I want to proudly stand next to the Glorious Star—the Ace Surgeon of the Trauma Center, Kim Jonghyun.”_

_“You need to do a lot of studying and have a lot diligence in order to do that.” Jonghyun says pulling him close and kissing him._

_“Well, I have a handsome-hot-charismatic-boyfriend for that right?” he teases biting his lips—Jonghyun hums as his hands roam underneath his shirt—warm hands touching his—“Don’t mind me guys, I’m just getting some grapefruit juice, carry on~ carry on~” Minki urges them—ruining their moment._

“I’m leaving, call me when they’re done.” Jonghyun tells Daehwi and glares at him before leaving—childish as ever. He looks at the back of the limping Chief as he exits the OR and he can’t help but sigh—he misses him already…

He hears another sigh—this time of relief from Hyunbin “Finally, thank you for that sunbae.” Daehwi gives Hyunbin an okay sign as he checks his work.

“But what got into his ass hyung? Why is he so hot-tempered today?” Hyunbin asks him

“True, Jonghyun hyung isn’t usually like that.” Daehwi says looking at him with his brow raised.

“Me.” He answers smugly as he focuses back on suturing. He hears Hyunbin say ‘of course, why did I even ask.’

“ _Too much information hyung, too much information.”_ Daehwi tells him in his _American accent_ shaking his head distaste.

“Deal with it _sunbaenim._ ” he answers teasing Daehwi.

“ **Deal with it? Until when hyung? It’s been 9 years—9 insufferable years dealing with the both of you!!** ” Daehwi says--more like screeching and he can’t even rebut that, because Daehwi’s right. 

_It’s been 9 years after all._

 

**_9 YEARS AGO_ **

_D-7_

 

_“Our Jonghyunnie… he’s changed Min-ah… He changed a lot… He’s no longer the Jonghyun who would think of himself as a failure… he works hard too you know—too hard… that he hardly sleeps…” he hears Seongwu’s voice “but I’m sure you already know that and you’re proud of him… you’re his one and only Minhyun after all… so come back soon… please… we all miss you so much…” he hears Seongwu’s voice cracking, he’s probably crying._

_He tries his best to let him know that he’s here and that he’ll be back soon_

_“Mi-Minhyun’s hand moved!!! I SWEAR!! I FELT IT!”  He hears Daniel shriek—good—it worked he tries again—but somehow it’s not easy._ _“Yeah sure Niel.” He hears Seongwu say_

_“DANIEL’S RIGHT!!! HIS HAND MOVED IN MINE TOO!!!” Dongho says—well atleast Dongho’s holding his hand rather than Jonghyun’s._

_Where is Jonghyun anyway? He tries his best deciphering the crying voices around him—but Jonghyun’s voice isn’t there at all..._  

_“Minhyun-ah… Minhyun-ah… You’ll wake up soon right?... you’ll come back to us soon… right? ” he hears Daniel sobbing voice talking to him—Daniel who’s the most carefree and would always cheer them up… is now crying because of him… He wants to comfort them so badly but he can’t—he feels the darkness swallowing him up again._

 

_D-6_

 

_“Minhyun-ah… it’s me, Kahi noona.” He feels Kahi noona’s small hands hold his. “Jonghyun told me that you can hear us… so I just want to thank you… it’s because of you that Jonghyun is the man that he is now… I wished you could see how you changed him… how much you inspired him to be better… He’s even writing a case study now—even with his busy schedule—can you believe it? The Jonghyun who would just read his mangas is now doing that?” Case studies? What case studies??? He doesn’t hear the next part as he gets swallowed again—As usual._

 

_D-5_

 

_“Good morning hyung… it’s me Jinyoung…” Jinyoung? Who the hell is Jinyoung? He doesn’t know anyone named Jinyoung—wait isn’t that the name of their classmate in med school?! The one who would always stick close to Jonghyun after they fought?!_

_“Anyway… Jonghyun hyung told me to stay with you tonight since he wouldn’t be able to go home—so we’ll have our usual slumber party—” WHY????? Where is Jonghyun again??! WHY IS JONGHYUN ALWAYS NOT HERE WHEN HE’S HERE_

_“That’s okay with you right? Well it’s not like you a choice anyway…” Jinyoung says chuckling—he feels a warm towel on his arms—hopefully the towel is clean, or else… he hears a song playing_

_“Yeah hyung?” He hears Jinyoung say “wait hyung I’ll put you on speaker.”_

_“Yah! No running in the—oh God.” Jonghyun? His Jonghyun?? “Are you okay??” He hears Jonghyun say “Daehwi, please take care of your co-intern and make sure he doesn’t bump on anything else—PLEASE.” he hears Jonghyun sigh loudly—a sign that he’s getting annoyed._

_“Is everything okay there hyung?”_

_“No—Hyungseob just crashed into a resus trolley, the ER is going crazy—and the coffee machine isn’t fucking working!” ER? As in emergency room??? Jonghyun is in the ER?? Why??_

_“Calm down hyung, do you want me to go down and get you some?”_

_“No, stay there, It’s my break anyway. How’s Minhyun?” Jonghyun’s break? Wait—is Jonghyun working at the ER?_

_“He’s doing good hyung.”_

_“Any changes?”_

_“Nothing much doc—same as usual…” Doc? Doctor??? His Jonghyun is a doctor???? Jonghyun is a doctor now?!_

_“Good… uh… can you…” he hears Jonghyun say_

_“No problem hyung” he hears movement on his side and someone opening the door._

 

_“Minhyun-ah… my Minhyunnie… I miss you…” Jonghyun tells him—his voice sounds so different from the Jonghyun earlier and the Jonghyun that he knows… this Jonghyun sounds so… what’s the word for that? Warm? Tender?_

_“I miss you so much Min…” he hears his voice cracking “I miss you more everyday…” Jonghyun tells him. His voice filled with longing,_ _Affection… and love…_

_That he thought he’ll never hear in his life_.

_Finally._

_“I’m sorry that I couldn’t go home tonight—so please be good and just keep doing what you’re doing okay? Don’t do anything else... I mean you can do anything—but not anything—okay I’m not making sense…” he hears him laugh._

_He can imagine Jonghyun’s face, the dimples in his cheeks… the way his eyes light up whenever he smiles… He wished he could see that beautiful smile of his now… he missed him so much_

_“What I mean is… you can do anything… but just don’t… leave us… okay?” He nods—he’s never gonna leave anyway—didn’t he promised him that? Long ago when they’re still kids?_

_“I know you won’t… you never break your promises anyway…” He wishes that Jonghyun is here next to him… hold him close… tell him that’s here… and that’s he’s never gonna leave…_

_He hears someone calling Jonghyun. “I guess that’s my cue to go… I love you Min… I’ll see you later…” Jonghyun tells him with so much affection… completely opposite from the Jonghyun that would push him away—making him miss him more… making him long for him so much..._

_“Jonghyun…”_

 

_“Oh my God.” He sees a guy—who’s wearing scrubs—drop the pillows on the floor. So this is Jinyoung? Hmm… cute but a little clumsy._

~

_His parents, Jonghyun’s parents, their sisters and Aron finally calmed down from all the crying (and kissing and hugging) and got ahold of themselves and accepted the fact that he’s really back. He got sick of it after 2 hours of constant ‘you’re really back Minhyun’ and him assuring them that he’s really here—conscious and talking—and that he’s gonna stay and they’re not dreaming._

_He looks at both of their parents whose busy talking with the doctors—on what happens next._

_“I still can’t believe you’re awake and you can actually talk!” His sister tells him in amazement—he rolls his eyes “OH MY GOD—DID YOU GUYS SEE THAT??? MINHYUN JUST ROLLED HIS EYES AT ME—OH MY GOD!!!” Sujin tells Kahi and Aron—as if he’s not here at all._

_“Can...you...please… kick her out”_

_“OH MY GOD!!! HE’S STILL AS RUDE AS EVER!!! YOU NASTY PIECE OF—” Aron pulls Sujin away before he gets hit in the head._

_“Thanks hyung…”_

_“No problemo, but… uh….”_

_“No.” He answers knowing what Aron’s gonna say_

_“I really don’t think this is a good idea…” Aron tells him—he shakes his head not wanting to have this argument again._

_“Just… bring the… boys hyung… make sure… he’s not… here and doesn’t… find out…” he whispers—his voice still raspy from all the years he hadn’t talk._

 

  _D-4, 3, and 2_

_...and you'd think him keeping this from Jonghyun will be hard? well think again. He's precious Jonghyun,  his Jjuya, the love of his life—hasn't been home much; and if he did come home, it will be in the wee hours when he's peacefully sleeping (he didn't even need to act like he's sleeping beauty) and by the time that he wakes up, the very infamous 'Ace of Trauma Center' is already gone and saving lives—which he is super proud of and in awe after hearing a lot of stories from Jinyoung, Dr. Jung, and even Jonghyun's Chief._

_and to be honest, it's good that they haven't met each other—when he's conscious or his plan for their special day will be all in ruined—but it would probably be like that too anyway, since he'll be asking the help of their friends—which means it'll just be a chaotic mess._

_He missed those asshats though... they still hadn't met yet—since he's also busy with his tests, doctor consultations (that doesn't seem to end) and the plans for his rehab—thank heavens everything seems to be working fine—especially the most important one; but he still had to go through a year of rehab to have his body moving back to its normal state._

_but anyway back to their friends, he misses them a lot—especially now... when he's just here idling away—having a slumber party with Jinyoung (since Jonghyun apparently can't go home again tonight) He wants to badly call them now but he_ _knows how they'll be (especially after seeing his and Jonghyun's families reaction) they would just cry all night—and hug and kiss (okay no kissing--he'd rather not have that.) then when they recover and got hold of the reality that he's back—they would just ruin his plan. Especially when he knows how Seongwu's big mouth works, then Daniel would just end up spouting nonsense—that would lead to Jonghyun figuring it out, and Dongho? he'll probably go straight to Jonghyun and tell him all about it._

_So as much as he misses them—he'll just suck it up—after all, he'll meet them tomorrow anyway._

_and hopefully no one kisses him._

 

_D-1_  

 

_He really regrets asking Aron for that favor—now he has 4 kids crying on him (literally) covering him with tears and snot—when he just had a bath._

_“Hyung.” Aron sighs. “Okay kiddos—time to stop now…” Aron says as he tries to pull one away—which is unsuccessful since the four would just cling to him tighter like those koala bears._

_“This is why I said we should tell Jonghyun—if Jonghyun is here, this wouldn’t happen.”_

_“Oh—come to think of it, Jonghyun’s not here?” Dongho asks—still a dummy as before._

_“Where’s Jong?” Daniel asks him. “ER” he answers pushing them off, Aron helps him._

_“He’s still working? Why???” Minki asks him and Aron._

_“You see Minhyun here—”_

_“Don’t tell me Jonghyun doesn’t know that you’re awake and kicking?” Seongwu says interrupting Aron._

_“Alive.” He corrects him._

_“You’ve always been alive smartass—you’re just not conscious.” He kicks Seongwu off the bed. “Did you just kick me you—”_

_“Hyung... Daehwi just told me that Jonghyun hyung would be late again tonight...” Jinyoung tells him apologetically—his hands holding onto scrub clothes that he asked him to bring_

_“Again?!” he asks annoyed._

_“Yeah… they… uh… there was an emergency… so yeah…” Jinyoung says looking down_

_“He’s… he’s… okay right??”_

_“He is hyung! Don’t worry—he just have to do surgery on a car crash—I-I wasn’t supposed to say that.” Jinyoung says hitting his mouth._ _He sees their friends looking at him and each other worriedly—understanding the case that Jonghyun’s handling…_

_“Jonghyun… he can... do it right?” He asks worrying for his Jonghyun… he knows that Jonghyun can do it… he just hopes that he won’t be scared… that it won’t remind him of him…_

_Seongwu sits next to him and holds his hand, Aron sits on the other side, Minki, Dongho and Niel joining them and patting him on the legs._

_Jinyoung smiles at him—not a tinge of worry and doubt in his face. “Of course hyung, he is isn’t called the ace for nothing.”_ _Good…good… you can do this Jonghyun… you can do this… We believe in you… I believe in you…_

_“Should we start planning then?” Aron asks him—changing the mood—he nods and quickly reaches for the whiteboard that he asked Aron to bring_

_“Listen up… asshats...”_

 

_D-Day_

 

_He wakes up to a brightened room, and Jonghyun not on his side—as usual. He tries to sit up—but something’s holding onto his hands—oh_

_You’re here._

_His Jonghyun came home._

_“Jonghyun...” he gently touches his hair—careful not to wake him up_

_“I’m back Jonghyun… you waited long... didn’t you?” He chuckles “I didn’t know... you could actually… be this patient…” he tells him as he pulls his hand, holding it tight with his._

_“I’m... so proud of… you… Jinyoung told me… that the surgery… was successful… that you save… the boy…I was actually… worried… since it was the… same case… as mine… but I know… that you could…do it… I always knew… that you’ll be a great surgeon… you are... Kim Jonghyun after all...”_

_He tells him as he brushes off the stray hair in his face.  “and thank you… for patiently… waiting for me…you’ve worked hard Jonghyun-ah… thank you…” he sees Jinyoung opening the door and he nods—time for his checkup._

_“I guess that’s my cue to go…” he chuckles—remembering Jonghyun telling him that before._ _“I love you… Kim Jonghyun… Always have… always will...I’ll see you later Jonghyun… Happy anniversary...” he says kissing his hand._

 

_~_

 

_“Don’t you fucking die on me Hwang Minhyun_

_I didn’t wait for 7 years just so you could die.” Jonghyun tells him—not even noticing his awake and their friends who are dressed as the code team._

_Ow—okay Jonghyun actually is good at chest compressions—no kidding there_

_“I think we need to stop him—” Daniel says but gets stopped by Ong—who’s enjoying this a little too much._

_Okay—it definitely hurts now—he needs to stop him “Jonghyun” He calls him—but gets ignored as Jonghyun continues reviving him._

_“JINYOUNG FUCKING GET THAT THING READY OR I’LL KILL YOU” Jonghyun looks hot when he’s angry—especially when he can see beads of sweat on his forehead—and his arms—wow, when did it get this—OUCH—THAT REALLY HURTS—he signals for his friends to take Jonghyun off of him—but Seongwu and Minki just smirks holding Daniel and Dongho in place—those asshats_

_“Jonghyun” he calls him again—and still no reaction. This isn’t what he imagined when he planned this—but what’s new—Jonghyun never does what he expects him to do anyway—OW!! OKAY NOW_

_“Jonghyun—it hurts.” He holds onto his wrists—Jonghyun pushes it away and continues—stubborn as usual—but he’s happy—Jonghyun’s doing his best to save him, not even caring when there’s no one helping him but just focuses on saving him—though he can’t say the same later—he’s probably gonna kill him._

_“I’ll really die if you continue this.” He says in between coughs—doing his best to hold onto his wrist—pulling it up from his chest—making Jonghyun stop—good—he can live._

_He takes Jonghyun’s hands in his—interlacing it together._

_Jonghyun looks up at him slowly (like those in the dramas), meeting his eyes and he smiles—he missed him so much… Jonghyun’s beautiful eyes—_ _mixed with confusion as he tries to grasp what’s happening… his small nose that he always love to pinch—flaring up—as he catches his breath… and those pink kissable lips of his that he wants to kiss so much…_

_Jonghyun suddenly turns and looks at their friends, finally understanding the situation—and he can’t but laugh—that took you long enough Jju._

_Jonghyun then looks at him furious—very very furious “You fucking assh—” Dongho and Daniel immediately (Thank God) pull him off from him—saving him before the love of his life kills him._

_He chuckles and slowly sits up, Doctor Jung and Jinyoung immediately goes to his side._

_“Are you feeling okay Minhyun?” Doctor Jung asks him “Yes… though it hurts a bit—I think Doctor Kim is good at chest compressions…” he says—teasing the furious Jonghyun—who’s trying his best to shake Daniel and Dongho off of him._

_“Oh he is! He’s the best in our team when it comes to reviving…” Doctor Lee says earning a glare from Jonghyun “He’s rude to his seniors though.” Doctor Lee adds_

_“Guess some things didn’t change at all huh Jonghyunnie? Still as bratty as always...” he teases him again, making Jonghyun snarl at him—wow always so feisty—but hot—definitely hot._

_“There there~~ calm down Jjuya~~” Seongwu coos at his Jonghyun, patting his hair like a puppy. If only he’s near Seongwu—he’ll slap his hand from touching his Jonghyun—this asshat_

_“See… this is why we told you that it’s a bad idea…” Daniel mumbles as he tries his best to keep his beloved in place._

_“We didn’t agree to this Jonghyun, just so you know.” Dongho adds—wow—Kang Dongho—weren’t you the one who was so excited earlier and kept on giggling like school girl because you can’t wait to see Jonghyun’s reaction?!_

_“You bastards.” Jonghyun tells them—and he can’t but laugh again at Jonghyun’s adorable furious face—how can he be this adorable when he’s furious?? Also he looks so handsome—Jonghyun in his doctor attire is HOT—okay save those thoughts for later._

  _He looks at him and smiles_

_“Welcome home Jjuya.”  He tells him with his arms wide open—welcoming home._

_Daniel and Dongho lets go of him and he quickly runs into him—holding him tight... snuggling into him just like before._

_Aside from the fact that Jonghyun’s shaking in arms—which is his fault._

_“I’m back now Jonghyun… I’m here now...” he reassures him… Jonghyun nods “I won’t leave you—I promised you didn’t I?” He tells him and Jonghyun just nods—he sees Aron signaling that they’ll just be outside and he nods—mouthing him a thank you for giving them a moment to be alone._

 

_“Jonghyun-ah… Jonghyun-ah…” he tries to pull him up—but his Jonghyun is too strong and remains unmoving in his arms. “I’m sorry… for scaring you love…” Jonghyun mumbles an ‘asshole’ making him laugh again._

_“Jonghyun-ah… look at me please?” Jonghyun complies and looks at him—his face full of tears… “I’m sorry Jju…” he tells him—wiping his tears away_

_“Just don’t ever do that again Min—you don’t know how terrified I was thinking…” Jonghyun tells him—leaning into him_

_“I know… I’m sorry Jju…” he tells him, kissing him on the forehead._

_“Don’t ever leave me… okay?”_

_“I won’t. I promised remember?” this time kissing his small nose._

_Jonghyun pulls him, kissing him—lightly… slowly… tenderly… affectionately…_

_Not like the ones you see in dramas… but much much better…_

_This time there aren’t crazy butterflies in his stomach…_

_This time—he’s just full of warmth…_

_Full of love…_

_Of finally being home._

_“I love you Min…”_

_“I love you too Jju… always have—”_

_“—always will.” Jonghyun tells him._

 

 

_It’s been 9 years since that day,_

_A lot of things changed, and a lot of things remained the same._

_They still bicker from time to time but they also do ~~make-up s~~ cuddles—yes cuddles._

_Jonghyun’s still a brat—and he’s still the neat freak and the nagger as before._

_But now, they learned and grew from their mistakes,_

_Learned to lean on each other…_

_To be patient with one another…_

_And be each other’s anchor._

_Just like how the moon brightens the night with the help of the stars, and_   _how without the other—the night sky wouldn’t be that beautiful and would just look empty and desolate._

 

He feels someone looking at him so he takes a glance at the door—he sees Jonghyun outside, leaning on the wall—looking at him.

He smiles and nods at the other—understanding what he wants to say.

Jonghyun winks at him—understanding what he said too.

 

Just like 31 years ago when they’re still kids,

Just like 22 years ago when they’re teens,

Just like 16 years ago when they hit the twenties,

Just like 9 years ago when he woke up,

 

_I'll make sure to leave some eel for you,_

_so hurry up and do your best okay?_

_I love you Minhyun,_

_Always have, Always will._

 

 ...Just like now, when they’re 36.

 

_You better leave some for me—you're not the only one who needs it._

_I'll do my best and make you proud._

_I love you too Jonghyun,_

_Always have, Always will._

_...and just like how the future them will be._

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And We're done~~ YEHEY!!!  
> congratulations if you've reached this part!!!! (I feel the same HAHAHAHA)
> 
> and as I stated at the notes above, I added some parts (D-4, 3, 2)  
> because the stupid me, didn't check what filename i uploaded that I ended up uploading the missing ones HAHAHAHA.  
> but its okay, its not that biggie anyway~ it's just a filler bc i can't take seeing D5 then suddenly its D1 lol  
> but enough of my babble, 
> 
> and thank you for reading~  
> please do leave comments and also support #TwoHyunWeek <333

**Author's Note:**

> ***MILK TEA TIME*** (I missed typing that lol )  
> firstly~~ I just want to thank the people behind #twohyunweek (really you guys are amazing!!!)  
> can we do this again??? please please please :D
> 
> and to my fellow creators/writers you worked hard!!! we all worked hard!!! really!!! let's do a virtual bear hug!!!*hugs*
> 
> and to everyone who's here reading, and supporting, and sharing, and liking and just everything~~ and not just here in AO3 but in tw land too--really thank you guys for supporting us!!! You don't know how it feels to see works/creations getting liked, rt'd, qrt'd, kudos, hits, comments, and everything else--it's just feels like so heartwarming and ugh--I'm just so proud of everyone and happy to be part of this <3333 (#feels)
> 
> and to those who read this long and messy story,  
> Thank you so much~ kamsamnida~~ salamat po~~  
> I hope you had fun reading this~~ (it was a roller-coaster ride for me XD )  
> and please leave comments (if you can) and also support the other creators too~  
> and that's all~ Thank you for the love and support!! (I just wanna say that XD) and happy #TwoHyunWeek everyone~


End file.
